


Just For One Night

by milexandmore



Series: The Willow Series [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt, John is confused, John's Wedding, John's stag night, M/M, Mentioned Mary Morstan, Minor Mycroft Holmes/Greg Lestrade, Misunderstandings, Mpreg, Mrs Hudson is an angel, Mrs Hudson is the best, Mrs Hudson is trying to help, Mrs. Hudson Ships It, Mycroft is a bit not good but he is trying to be better, One Night Stand?, Parenthood, Parentlock, Sherlock is sad, Sherlock is trying to protect his baby, The Stag Night Fix-It (Sherlock: The Sign of Three), Uncle Mycroft, rare condition, sherlock is a cutie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-03-20 10:07:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 24,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18990511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milexandmore/pseuds/milexandmore
Summary: John's stag night - Sherlock and John aren't interrupted by Mrs Hudson and a client - the night takes another turn.





	1. Chapter 1

It’s John stag night, and after only having been gone two hours drinking in severals pubs, and clubs. They are comfortably settled on their chairs, somehow placed closer than usual, playing ‘Who am I?’ 

“Am I a vegetable” asks John

“You or the thing? Pfff” laughs Sherlock.

“Funny!” 

“Thank you.”

“Come on!”

“No. you’re not a vegetable.” slurs Sherlock.

“Your go.” John slashes on his chair.

“Erm… Am I Human?”

“Sometimes.”

“You can’t have sometimes, it has to be hmm…”

“Yes, you’re human!”

“Yes, I know. Ok, and am I a man?”

“Yep!”

“Tall?”

“Not as tall as people think.”

“Hmm.Nice?”

“-ish.”

“Clever?”

“I’d say so.”

“You would. Hmm, am I important?”

“To some people.”

“Do ‘people’ like me?”

“No, they don’t, you tend to rub them up the wrong way.”

“Ok. Am I the current king of England?”

“We… [laugh], you know we don’t have a king.”

“Don’t we?”

“No.”

”Your go.” Sherlock settles back on his chair.

 

John sits up on his chair, a bit too fast and almost loses his balance. His hand grabs hold on Sherlock’s knee and the touch linger for a bit. Making a shiver crossing Sherlock’s spine.

“I don’t mind.” says John shrugging.

“Anytime…” says Sherlock too quietly to be heard. 

“Am I a woman?”

Sherlock laughs. 

“What?” asks John.

“Yes.”

“Am I… pretty?” asks John as Sherlock sit up a bit. “This?” clarified John showing the piece of paper on is forehead and waiting for Sherlock’s answer. 

“Beauty is a construct based entirely on childhood impression, influences and role models.” recites Sherlock.

“Yeah, but am I a pretty lady?”

Sherlock leans forward and squints his eyes at the paper, not really remembering what name he put on it. 

“I don’t know who you are, I don’t know who you’re supposed to be.”

“You picked the name!” says John loudly. 

“Yeah but I pick it at random from the papers.”

“You not really getting the hang of this game, are you, Sherlock?” he settles back on his chair.

“So I am human. I’m not as tall as people think I am. I’m…nice-ish, clever, important to some people, but I tend to rub them up the wrong way. [laugh] Got it!” says Sherlock

“Go on then.”

“I’m you, aren’t I?”

“No. [laugh] I think, this is not the best game for us.” John takes off the piece of paper from his head and reads it “Seriously, Sherlock? You don’t know who Madonna is?”

“Wait, isn’t it the woman who sings the virgin song.”

John bursts into laughter. “Trust you to remember this one though…”

Sherlock takes off the piece of paper from his forehead too. “I don’t understand?”

“What?”

“Were we supposed to labelled each other, like some piece of furniture, you should have told me, that would have been way more easier.”

“It’s not really the aim of the game, the aim is to guess the name on your forehead, I just thought it’ll be funny…”

“It was though...”

“Yeah… Should we play another game?”

“I don’t know I’m not really good at them apparently.”

“It’s fine you’re good at other things anyway.”

 

Suddenly an image from a couple of minutes ago crossed Sherlock’s mind and he sees John’s hand on his knee again, and another shiver crossed his spine.

“John?”

“Yeah?”

“When you touch me a bit earlier…you said… that you didn’t mind, I wanted to let you know that I didn’t mind either.”

“Ok. That’s good.”

“I… I mean… If you want to do it again… that’ll be quite fine…”

“You want me to touch you like this.” says John putting his hand on Sherlock’s knee again. 

“Yeah… I don’t mind…” whispers Sherlock.

“Do you like it? I mean… do you like it when I touch you?”

“Yeah…” says Sherlock shuddering, and his eyes filled with lust as John looks straight at him. “Touch me John…”

“Like this?” says John keeping eyes contact with Sherlock as his hand travels further up Sherlock’s thigh. 

“Yeah…like this John…” breathes Sherlock. 

“God Sherlock…” John leans further onto Sherlock placing his other hand on Sherlock’s hips. “I want to kiss you.”

“Please.” and with that John press their lips together. Sherlock responds quite fervently, like he was a man out of breath and John was giving him some precious air. 

They continue kissing as John straddles Sherlock legs, pressing their chest together. 

They pull apart from air, and John continues kissing down Sherlock’s neck, throat, unbuttoning Sherlock shirt along the way. 

“John…” Sherlock moans. 

John strips Sherlock off his jacket and shirt at once. 

“God Sherlock, you… you are so gorgeous…”

“Bedroom, please John.“

John seems to realize what they are doing and suddenly moves backwards a bit, putting some distance between him and Sherlock, while still straddling him. 

“Are you serious about this Sherlock?” he asks. 

“John, I know that it’ll be just this once, but this is our last chance to…“

“I…”

“John, many men on their stag night have sex with one of the strippers, I think that’s quite what this night is for really, saying goodbye to things you can’t do once you married… including having sex with other people… I know your moral principle, but this is not really cheating in a way…”

“I… It seems legit…”

“I’m sorry… I should have realised…” says Sherlock suddenly, distancing himself a bit. 

“What?”

“You would have prefer to have sex with a stripper, female preferably…”

“No. No. That’s not what I meant Sherlock, it’s just… It doesn’t mean anything right?”

Sherlock swallows the lump in his throat, because of course, for John it wouldn’t mean anything, even if for him, it means the world, but it’s his last chance to have John for him, even if it’s just for this night. So he lies “Of course.”

“Right” John nods. 

“Would you want to take me to bed now?”

“Oh god yes!” John gets up, taking Sherlock’s hand, forcing him to get up too. And they start kissing again, Sherlock stripping John off his jumper and shirt and planting kisses everywhere on his chest, taking his time on John’s nipples as he moans and planting a kiss on his shoulder scar before pushing him towards his bedroom, kissing his mouth again. 

After much struggle on the hallway, both refusing to part for a second too long, they finally made it to the bedroom. John takes the lead and pushes Sherlock on the bed, while closing the door with his feet. 

Sherlock pants on the bed while John strip him off of his shoes and socks, and then of his trousers and pants, leaving him naked on the bed, eyes full of lust. 

“You too John, I want to see you naked.” Sherlock almost blushes. 

John quickly strips to nothing too and fall on his knee next to the bed, his hands travelling up Sherlock's legs while Sherlock sits up on his elbows watching John between his leg. 

John continues caressing Sherlock thighs while planting kisses from his navel down to his crotch. When he starts to approach Sherlock’s hard cock, Sherlock moans “Yeah right there John.”

And John for the first time took a cock in his mouth, he tries to remember what he likes to be done at him to try to reproduce it on Sherlock. Sherlock is moaning his name, again and again, now lying down on his bed, gripping the bed sheets in his hands.

“Stop!” suddenly he cries. 

John immediately takes a step back, asking panicked “Why? Did I hurt you?”.

“No! No! It just that if you continue like this I’m going to come way too soon, and I want more.”

“What do you mean more?”

“John I want you to take me.” he says seriously. 

“You…you’re sure?”

“Absolutely, I want to feel you inside me please…”

“God Sherlock, stop saying things like this or I’m gonna come right here and now.”

“Come here.” Sherlock says taking John’s right hand and pulling him on him. 

They kiss for a while rubbing their cock together. 

“Do you really want this Sherlock?” asks John when they stop. 

“Yes John… please fuck me!”

“Alright.” John sits on his knees between Sherlock's thighs and starts caressing Sherlock’s crotch and arse. “Have you got any lube?” 

“Night drawer on your right.”

“Right.” John takes out the bottle, applies a little bit of the liquid on his fingers, and starts caressing Sherlock’s entrance. “Sherlock, you have to stop me if I hurt you in any way.” says John sobering up a bit. 

“John, you’re a doctor, you know how to touch a man’s prostate, without hurting him, don’t worry, I trust you.”

“Sherlock is not the same! Please promise me you tell me to stop if I hurt you.”

“Ok!”

John slowly pushes one finger on the knots of muscle, while stimulating Sherlock’s cock with his other hand. Sherlock’s made a pain face, but quickly moans. “Please John, don’t stop…”

John slowly opens Sherlock, adding another finger, and a third one, as Sherlock fucks himself on them. 

“Please John, take me now, I’m ready!” 

“Ok.Ok.” John slowly pulls out his fingers and Sherlock made a sad noise at the loss. 

“Condom?”

“Don’t have any…”

“Sherlock…”

“It’s fine John, I’m clean, and I know you are too, we don’t need it, I want to be able to feel you completely…”

“You’re sure?”

“Completely sure, please John…”    

“Alright.” John quickly lubes his cock and press the head against Sherlock’s entrance. “Sherlock…”

“I promise I’ll stop you if you hurt me John.” Sherlock recites “Now please fuck me John!” 

John slowly enters him, stopping for a while when he’s fully inside. Sherlock almost wants to cry. 

“John” he moans “John I can feel you…”

“Sherlock you feel so good, god…”

“You can move now John, I’m ready…”

“Sure?”

“If I tell you!”

And John starts to move slowly at first, going almost all the way out before entering all the way in again. 

“Faster, please John…” Sherlock moans and John joins him “Oh god!”

John starts to fuck Sherlock faster and faster, quickly installing a rhythm and Sherlock joining him and fucking himself harder on John’s cock. 

John kisses Sherlock’s mouth, face, and neck, while Sherlock moans his name louder and louder. 

Sherlock can feel his climax coming and it’s almost too soon, he slowly strokes himself, to relieve a bit of pressure, while John loses himself at the sight and fuck him harder and faster.

“Sherlock, I’m gonna come…” John moans. 

“Yes! Come inside me, I want to feel you cum inside me please, John…”

“You’re sure?”

“John, please stop asking! And fill me with your cum!” 

And that did it, he comes hard inside of Sherlock while feeling him clench against his cock as Sherlock climax too. 

After a few minutes, John pulls out his flattening cock, and roll next to Sherlock. 

Sherlock quickly rolls over to him and take him in a small embraced, placing his head on John’s chest. 

“Thank you John!”

“It’s me who should thank you Sherlock, that was amazing!” 

“You really think so?”

“Of course, Sherlock that was probably the best sex I ever had.”

“Really? … Was it your first time with a man?”

John swallows, a bit nervous suddenly. “Hmm yeah…”

“Me too. Just so you know…”

“First time with a man?”

“First time full stop actually…”

“Wait, you’re a virgin…”

“Was, John, was, you just took my virginity away, and thank god for that, it was getting rather tedious to be tease by Mycroft!”

“Wait, you mean I’m your first?”

“Yes, please follow, and only one I should think, are you always this stupid after sex…”

“What do you mean only one? You didn’t like it?”

“Of course I liked it John, haven’t you see how hard I climax! I just think… I wouldn’t want to try it again with someone else… relationships are not really my area…”

“Yeah but… You can still have some one night stand… Not that I recommend it but…”

“I don’t think that it’ll be as satisfying… But thank you John for this…”

“Why did you let me then?”

Sherlock seems to think, he wants to tell him because he loves him and couldn’t imagine having sex with anyone else but him, but he knows he can’t, so instead he says “Because I’ve known you for a long time, and I trust you…” 

“Well thank you Sherlock.” John replies, feeling tears startling in his eyes. 

“John can you stay here tonight?” pleads Sherlock.

“I… Yeah I think I can…” John doesn’t know if he has the force to let go just now anyway, and truth is, Sherlock wanted to ask him if he could stay here forever. 

“We should clean ourselves up first though…”

“Tedious…” 

John disentangles himself for Sherlock and goes in the ensuite to retrieve a towel, and quickly clean themselves. He then joins Sherlock again in the bed, and Sherlock takes back his position on his chest. John without really realising it plant a kiss in his curls and Sherlock smiles. “Goodnight Sherlock.”

“Goodnight John.” 

And they fall asleep. 

The morning after, Sherlock opens his eyes to find that John is already gone, and he feels himself cry at the loss. It doesn’t matter that he knew it’ll be just for one night, it still hurts. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first time I think that I wrote a sex scene so please forgive any awkwardness ^^ 
> 
> Come and say Hi on [ my Tumblr ](http://artsherlocked.tumblr.com/)  
> If you have requests or prompts you can contact me either through my Tumblr or by sending me an email at artsherlocked@gmail.com. I also started to do some fanart so you can ask for these too. 
> 
> Hope you liked the story! Leave a kudo or comment to let me know :)


	2. Chapter 2

They don’t see each other the next day. John is busy finishing the last few details of his wedding or he likes to pretend, and he told Mary that Sherlock won’t come helping as he still recovering from an awful hangover. Sherlock spends the day trying to find a good case to solve, but nothing retains his attention, so instead he plays sad music on his violin or sulks on the couch, he doesn’t really know why he keeps up this facade, nobody will care, he’s alone, Mrs Hudson is busy playing cards and gossiping with Mrs Turner, and John won’t be coming back. And at this thought, he lets himself cry again for the second time that day. 

The day after that is the wedding. Sherlock tries to cheer himself up by rehearsing the dance he has taught John a few weeks ago, but even if he tries to pretend that John is still here, still in his arms, his eyes show him how empty his arms truly are and he feels like crying, thankfully Mrs Hudson interrupts his sorrow telling him that it’s time to prepare himself as they had to go in 1 hour. She isn’t helping though when she told him things like "marriage changes people" or that she had abandoned her own best friend after her wedding. The thing is Sherlock can accept the fact that he had to share John, and that he’ll never be truly his, but he can’t accept to not have him in his life in some way.

Sherlock is nervous at the idea of seeing John. John is too that's why he tries his best to concentrate on Mary and any other guests that aren't Sherlock. Sherlock can sense that John is avoiding him, he saw that John can’t even look him in his eyes. 

John can’t because he can’t look at Sherlock without remembering how he left in the early hour of the morning, trying not to wake Sherlock. He didn't want to but he was too afraid of having to have a conversation with Sherlock about what they had just done. Because he knows that whether or not they agreed it didn’t mean anything, it still does, what kind of man sleeps with his bed friend two days before getting married really?

So they pretty much avoid each other and tries to pretend that nothing happened. John still hugs Sherlock after his moving speech, but that's as much contact as they allowed each other, and they both know that it’s already too much, as images from their night of passion float through their mind, Sherlock to avoid them tries to concentrate back on his speech, while John reluctantly let him go.

Sherlock also sees the way that Mary is trying to make him jealous about John’s ex-commander, Major Sholto, but as soon as his thoughts take him away, trying to imagine what had happened between them, he remembers that John had told him that he was the first man, he had ever had sex with, though he could still be lying… no John would not… would he?

John is happy to see that James Sholto, his ex-commander and friend, has made it to his wedding. His presence also makes him bitter, as he realizes that what he had felt for him a long time ago was a bit more than friendship, not that they ever acted on it, apart from a drunken kiss one night. But what he had felt for him still does not compare to what he feels for Sherlock, it doesn’t even come close. With these thoughts, he wonders if he’ll ever feel less for Sherlock, their night of passion haven’t made anything to help him moving on, on the contrary, it has served to show him what he could have had, if he hasn’t chosen Mary, but even if it makes him feel bitter, it’s too late now, he has already made his choice. 

Sherlock continues to suffer through the wedding until he can sense that his presence isn’t required anymore and that it’d be acceptable he thinks if he leaves now. 

John sees him going towards the doors, but doesn’t think too much of it, thinking that Sherlock must be in need of some fresh air, he knows that he doesn’t like being surrounded by many people, he just hopes that he won’t take the opportunity to smoke a cigarette though. After some time, when he realises that Sherlock isn’t coming back, he realizes that after some thinking, he would have prefer the cigarette.

Sherlock arrives at Baker St, crying. He doesn’t even take off his coat, keeping it as an armour to shield himself from the outside world and sit on his chair. All he could think of is of John here with him two days ago, John kissing him with passion, and feeling himself so wonderfully alive in John’s arms. The sight of John’s chair is disgusting him, taunting him with what he can’t have anymore, not that he ever had a chance to start with, still, he had hope, that someday they could be this, they could be them but in a more romantic way. Disgusting, Sherlock thinks to himself, he suddenly feels very sick and almost runs to the bathroom to vomits the wedding dinner. How appropriate he thinks to himself. He spends almost all night on his knees next to the toilet, his stomach convulsing even though he has nothing to regurgitate anymore. Around 6 in the morning, feeling too tired he finally goes back to the sitting room and falls asleep on the couch, still entirely dressed.  

That’s how Mrs Hudson found him the next morning. “Oh, Sherlock! You will hurt you back sleeping on this poor couch. Come on, I made you a cup of tea.”

“Not thirsty!” he replies, eyes closed and his face still facing the back of the couch.

“What is it dear? You never refused a cuppa before, except maybe when… Oh no… Have you taken drugs again Sherlock?”

“No! Not that you’re in the best place to judge, I know you still indulge in your ‘herbal soother’ regularly…”

“They therapeutical, for my hips! I’m not trying to destroy myself like you!” 

Sherlock flinches at that, though he knows it’s the truth, even though he pretends it’s to calm his ever racing mind, he knows that deep inside, he likes the destruction that it brings him. 

“I’m sorry dear, I shouldn’t have said that…” apologizes Mrs Hudson. 

“Why not? It’s the truth no?”

“Sherlock, what is it? Why are you like this?”

“I’m not ‘like this’, as you say, I just wish you will leave me alone.”

“You not my first smackhead Sherlock, now you will answer me! Why are you so distressed?”

There’s a long silence before Sherlock closes his arms even tighter on himself and whispers “It’s the end… He isn’t coming back…” and tears fell down his cheeks again. 

Mrs Hudson comes to sit down next to him and hugs him “Oh this is about John, I should have known… You know that he’s still your friend even though he’s married, that doesn’t change anything.”

“You said it yourself, marriage changes people! He already changed…”

“Now why you’re saying that? He got married only yesterday, nothing has changed, and nothing will be, he’ll soon come to solve cases with you again. Maybe not often as before, I'll give you that, but you’ll still spend time with each other, that’s what friends do, married or not!”

“You don’t understand… He already distanced himself, ignored me through the wedding except during my best man speech…”

“He was occupied with other guests, it’s normal Sherlock, I’m sure it wasn’t intentional…”

“I know it was…”  

“Why?”

“I…”

“Is it because of what happened during his stag night?”

“You know?” 

“Of course, I could hear you despite my earplugs, you weren’t very discreet!”

“Hmm, sorry…”

“Have you talked to him after this happened?”

“No we haven’t talked about it and we won’t, we agreed it doesn’t mean anything, that it was a one-time thing.”

“It does though…”

“What?”

“Mean something. It does mean something for you, I can tell.”

“It doesn’t matter anyway, it won’t happen again, and now John doesn’t even want to talk to me…”

“How can you know, Sherlock? Call him later today, I’m sure he’ll come around.”

Sherlock doesn’t reply and lets go of Mrs Hudson. She passes him his cup of tea, and he sips it up a bit quietly. When Mrs Hudson goes to the door, he whispers a small “Thank you.”, she nods and asks “Sherlock, talks to John, ok?”

He nods too, though later he never picks up his phone to call John… 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come and say Hi on [ my Tumblr ](http://artsherlocked.tumblr.com/)  
> If you have requests or prompts you can contact me either through my Tumblr or by sending me an email at artsherlocked@gmail.com. I also started to do some fanart so you can ask for these too. 
> 
> Hope you liked the story! Leave a kudo or comment to let me know :)


	3. Chapter 3

For the next two days, Sherlock wakes up vomiting and being depressed in general. 

On the second day Mrs Hudson caught him vomiting, and of course worries immediately. She gets to call John before remembering that he’s on his honeymoon, she then contact her doctor so she can come and examine him. 

After a while, once the nausea went away, Sherlock goes to sit on the couch. Mrs Hudson comes up to him again with a cup of tea. 

“Feeling better?” she hasn’t commented when he was still face upon the toilet, though as she knows Sherlock, he noticed she was there before. 

“Yeah… kinda… Must have eaten something spoiled or something…”

“Oh really, what? You haven’t eaten a thing except one or two of my biscuits since the wedding… And I can assure you they are not spoiled!”

“Well… I don’t know then maybe I’m just sick, having caught gastroenteritis or something…”

“That’s what we’ll see, I called my doctor so she can check up on you.”

“Absolutely not! I don’t need a doctor, I’m perfectly fine!”

“Sherlock, calms down, I know your usual doctor isn’t available at the moment, but you still sick and need to be examined!”

“I won’t let anyone besides John examine me!” and of course Mrs Hudson’s doctor chooses this moment to ring the bell. 

“I’m sorry Sherlock but you’ll have to… That must be her, please be nice!” 

“Like that’s going to happen!”

“I’m serious Sherlock!”

 

“Hello Mrs Hudson!”

“Hello Mrs Wright! The patient is upstairs, I apologise in advance for his behaviour but I’m really worried about him.”

“Yes, I understand, you told me that he wakes up vomiting, and overall feel depressed?”

“Yes, but I don’t know if the two are linked…”

“Ok, let me examine him then.”

They go upstairs, and as Mrs Hudson had anticipated, Sherlock won’t be an easy patient, he had, of course, fled to his room, the instant she went out to answers the door.

“Please wait here. I’m going to fetch him.”

“Sure.” Mrs Wright sits down on the couch. 

“Sherlock! Stop being a child, and come see the doctor!” 

“I already told you that I am in no need of a doctor! I’m perfectly fine!” 

“We both know that’s not true, or you won’t have spent your first waking hours with the face upon the toilet! Now come out of this room!”

“No!”

“Sherlock, don’t make me call Mycroft!”

“As if he’ll be able to make me come out!”

“I wasn’t talking about that Sherlock, I’ll tell him what happened during John’s stag night.”

“You wouldn’t!” he opens the door with much force than necessary. 

“Oh yes! Now stop being a child, and come to the living room!”

Sherlock reluctantly go, he knows that if he tries to refuse once more, it’ll be in vain, to suffer through it, is the only to get rid of both of them, so he can spend his day alone once again. Of course, he could try to deduce some dark secrets from the doctor, but it would only make things worse, and to be entirely honest, he can’t find the energy in him.

 

The doctor examines him. 

“How long since you started vomiting?”

“Three days.” he knows it has started right after he had come back from the wedding. 

“Three days? Really? Why you didn’t tell me anything?” asks Mrs Hudson. 

Sensing Sherlock’s distress or annoyance at Mrs Hudson questions, the doctor quietly asks “Can you leave me alone with the patient, for a moment, I want to ask him about some private matter and he might not be comfortable replying if you are here.”

“Oh sure. I’m going to make some biscuits and tea.”

“Good idea.”

 

They wait until Mrs Hudson is gone. 

“Has something might have trigger your sickness?”

“I don’t know, maybe I have eaten something..”

“No, if it was something spoiled, you won’t have them as regularly, you said that it’s mostly when you wake up right?”

“Yes, every morning, for three days, now, I don’t really feel any nausea, the rest of the day, though I noticed I’m more sensitive to scents, and probably taste too, that or Mrs Hudson had put more sugar than usual in my tea.”

“I doubt it, she is a woman of habit. Listen, these symptoms don’t resemble those of gastroenteritis. Now if you would have been a woman, I might have considered a pregnancy test, as they are more similar to morning sickness… I’m going to run some test, blood test and all, to see what it can be. I call you as soon as I got the result.”

“Thanks. Now could you please tell my landlady that she can’t stop worrying!”

“She is your landlady?”

“Yes, why?”

“No, I thought you were her son or nephew since she cares so much about you… you seem rather close.”

“We are close I suppose…”

“Goodbye, Mr Holmes. I won’t worry too much if I were you, it might just be an allergy or something small.”

“Thanks. Goodbye.”

 

A few days later, the doctor comes back herself with the results. She had called him and explain to him that she wanted to talk to him face to face, about them. That, if he was entirely honest, makes him a bit worried, maybe she will tell him, that he has cancer or something, and is going to die… 

She interrupted his thought as she steps on the landing, the door of his flat already open.

 

“What is it then?” he asks not turning around, still glancing down the windows. “How long do I have?”

“No, no, Mr Holmes, it's nothing like that. I apologise for worrying you this way. It’s just, it’s a… rather unusual case that you have and I wanted to announce it to you directly face to face, because it may come as a shock, believe me.”

“But I’m not going to die?”

“No, Mr Holmes.” she sits down on the couch, while Sherlock sits down on his chair, taking his usual thinking position, hands joined below his chin, and eyes closed. “Have you ever heard of masgravida, Mr Holmes?” asks Mrs Wright.

“No but based on my knowledge of Latin, I would say that it suggests a case of male pregnancy, somehow?” says Sherlock eyes still closed and seemingly annoyed.

“Exactly, it is… some might say a disease, but it’s more like a very rare genetic occurrence which gives some men the capacity to become pregnant and give birth.”

At this Sherlock puts his hands down on the armrests of his chair, and direct his gaze towards the doctor. “That’s ridiculous! How is that even possible?” 

“Well, it’s a bit complicated and we still don’t really know entirely how it works, as I said that’s rather rare, they are not many subjects, but they have some sort of uterus and it works almost like a female pregnancy though the baby is usually delivered by caesarean.”

“Why are you telling me all these bullshits, and how is that had anything to do with me?”

“I… You happen to be one of those men, Mr Holmes. Is there any case of it in your family? It’s usual hereditary.”

“Of course no! What are you talking about now?! Are you a real doctor seriously?”

“I know that it may come as a shock, but the results leave no doubt, you’re pregnant.”

“I’m… pregnant?” 

“Yes. A week pregnant approximately according to my calculation.” 

Sherlock thoughts go back to a week before, even though there’s not much trouble knowing who the father is, as John is the only one he ever had sex with. Images of their night of passion come back to his mind. 

“Do you know who the father is?” Mrs Wright asks cautiously. 

“Yes…”

“I know it’s a lot to take into account, and you probably need to think about it for a short while, so I’m going to leave your results here, with an advice sheet for pregnancy, though they usually made for women, I tried to adapt it a bit to your needs. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to contact me, you have my details on your dossier and…”

“They won’t be any question, except one, where can I get an abortion?” he interrupts her.

“Are you sure about it Mr Holmes? I know it is a shock for you, and it'll surely  also be for your partner…”

“He’s not my partner!” he interrupts again. 

“I’m sorry Mr Holmes, it’s just… you should consider it a chance too, not many men had the capacity, and there are fewer cases still when a man with masgravida condition, may carry more than one child in his life. You should let yourself think about it before making any rash decision. Call me in two days, and let me know what you have decided, ok?”

“If you insist, I don’t think it’ll make any difference, but let’s wait two days!”

“Goodbye, Mr Holmes.”

“Goodbye.” 

 

Sherlock sits for a while and let himself think about it, when his eyes settle on John’s chair. That’s when he realizes that it’s not anyone child, he is carrying, but John’s. A little part of John that he may be able to keep with him, and his alone. He let himself imagine what it would be like to have a small version of John’s, maybe the baby will have his eyes, his beautiful ocean eyes, that makes Sherlock drown himself in. Or maybe the baby will have his hair, his beautiful, sun-blond hair, maybe curly like Sherlock’s one. And Sherlock just smiles. He cannot abandoned this child, it’s the last thing it would have of John. And he rather like the idea to have a child when he think about it, he could teach them all about chemistry and crime, and they would maybe become the next consulting detective in town, when he gets too old for the job.  

He then stands up, skims over his results quickly, and goes to sit at the desk to do some research on male pregnancy, because if he’s gonna do this, he wants to do it well. This doctor seems to not know a thing about male pregnancy so he’s gonna do his own research and probably become a specialist on the subject within a few days, he wants to know all there is to know on this. But above all, he doesn’t want to do anything who can hurt the small human growing inside him, though when he thinks about it, this hasn’t started well. He hasn’t eaten enough for himself the previous days, and so certainly not enough for both of them. It’s not only his own health that he has to think about now, but his child too, and this is the best motivator he ever had for having to take care of himself, a thing that even a certain army doctor, though having come close, hasn’t succeeded to make him do. 

 

Two days after, he lets Mrs Wright know that he has changed his mind, she is thrilled for him, he also tells her that he requires all the information she can have access to, on male pregnancy, just in case he has missed anything.   

They scheduled check-up appointment twice a month, to Sherlock insistence that once is not enough, and anything might occur between 2 appointments too wide spread in time. 

Sherlock doesn’t tell anyone and continues to live normally, though taking extra care of himself, and following any advice he may find on male pregnancy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't speak Latin and never learn it so I apologise if the Latin term that I tried to invent for Sherlock's condition, based on a quick research online sounds wrong. If any of you have a better knowledge of Latin, let me know how you would translate male pregnancy or if you have a better idea of how to name this condition, please let me know :)
> 
> Come and say Hi on [ my Tumblr ](http://artsherlocked.tumblr.com/)  
> If you have requests or prompts you can contact me either through my Tumblr or by sending me an email at artsherlocked@gmail.com. I also started to do some fanart so you can ask for these too. 
> 
> Hope you like the story! Leave a kudo or comment to let me know :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all of you who have left kudos and comments on this fic, they really brighten my day and help me see what you like about this story.  
> TBH I was really surprised by the reactions to this fic as I hesitating a long time before deciding to post it.  
> This fic is a lot of firsts for me - first smut, first mpreg so I'm really glad that you guys seem on board with it :) Hope I will not let you down with the rest of the story ^^
> 
> -
> 
> Come and say Hi on [ my Tumblr ](http://artsherlocked.tumblr.com/)  
> If you have requests or prompts you can contact me either through my Tumblr or by sending me an email at artsherlocked@gmail.com. I also started to do some fanart so you can ask for these too. 
> 
> Hope you like the story! Leave a kudo or comment to let me know :)

For a month Sherlock continues to live as normally as possible, taking cases, but which do not demands running across London or putting him in too much danger, if at all possible.

The second month, he takes fewer cases, but try to behave as usual as to try not to raise any suspicion, he hasn’t told anyone but his pregnancy is not showing much. 

The third month his belly starts to show a bit but it’s still manageable, he only takes 3 cases that month, and goes to have his first ultrasound in secret. 

His gynaecologist, Dr Cooper, has already monitored three men with masgravida, and studied the subject for a long time, so he is considered as an expert in this domain. He met him two weeks before his first ultrasound after thorough research online to find the best gynaecologist he could find. The man wasn’t even supposed to be based in London as he mostly built his career in the States, but cases of masgravida being so rare he was interested in taking Sherlock as a patient. Of course Sherlock being Sherlock, he kind of already treats his pregnancy as an experiment, not in the sort of “Sherlock don’t put a severed head in the fridge or eyes in the microwave” way but more in a genuine interest to get data to try to make his pregnancy as healthy as possible so it really helped to convince Dr Cooper to accept to monitor him as not only these data would reassure Sherlock but they will also move Dr Cooper’s research on masgravida forward.

“Hello Mr Holmes, how are you feeling today?”

“I’m fine, I guess, I saw Mrs Wright yesterday and the results of my exams were good, so…”

“No reason to worries then, it’s perfect, I did receive them also actually, and I’m actually impressed at how good they are, you’re in perfect shape, and the baby seems perfectly healthy. So let’s ask them directly then, shall we?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, my child might be a genius, but there is no way that they can communicate at this stage.”

“Of course, Mr Holmes, they may not be able to communicate in the usual way, but the ultrasound can tell us a lot about them actually. Let’s see then, shall we?”

“Absolutely.”  

“Please lie down on the chair over here and open up your shirt.” 

Sherlock does as he told, he quickly divest himself from his coat and jacket, and unbutton his new purple shirt (one size bigger than his usual, as he always liked his shirt tight, he can’t really wear any now, so he had to buy some new ones with a similar cut but which doesn’t show his small belly growing).

“It might be a little cold, I’m sorry.” says Dr Cooper as he applies the gel on Sherlock's belly and goes to grab the transducer. 

“Ready to meet the little one?” 

“I guess…”

“Nervous?”

“I…”

“Don’t worry it’s normal to be a bit nervous, but there is no reason to worry.”

He places the transducer on Sherlock’s belly and starts to search for the baby. 

“See their little head here?” he asks while showing it to Sherlock on the monitor. 

And Sherlock was never the one to believe to be so emotional, but he actually started to feel happy tears falling from his fascinated eyes. 

“That’s in fact… That’s my child?”

“Yes Mr Holmes, do you wish to know their sex?”

“I…”

Mrs Hudson is a bit surprised to see him smiling when he returns to Baker Street, but he can’t stop himself as he thinks of the photo of his baby carefully guarded in his jacket pocket. 

“Have you seen John then?” she asks. 

“No, why?” asks Sherlock confused. 

“It’s just… you look happy, you must have a fascinated case then, what is it? Serial killer? Triple homicides?”

“None of that, though the triple homicides sound interesting.” he smiles 

“Why are you smiling like that then, good news?” 

“We can say that yes.” 

“Is it about John?” 

“No, not everything has to do with John, Mrs Hudson!” he says a bit angry and quickly climbing the stairs to his flat, slamming the door behind him. 

Mrs Hudson is a bit confused at his sudden mood change but she knows better than to interfere when he is like that, so she lets him be for the time being.

Suddenly, Sherlock seems to realise that he would have to hide it from John as well, not that he had any contact with him over the last three months but he might become a problem, especially if he stays here in London, he can’t go hanging around London with his pregnant belly and hope that people won’t notice. And of course, when someone will notice they go and tell John, and he will surely make the connection with himself. Especially after what he had confessed when they had cuddled in bed. 

No John can’t know about the baby, and surely not that the child is his. What if he learns about it and forces Sherlock to abort. No, it’s too late for an abortion, anyway, but what if he forces him to abandon it. No, it’s not his choice only, it’s his child as much as it is John so he would keep them anyway, that’s his right. 

Not the moment to worry about that, John hasn’t been in contact these last three months anyway, he probably doesn’t even care about Sherlock anymore. 

But a couple of days later, while Sherlock goes to make himself a cup of tea, decaffeinated, of course, his phone rings. He looks at the caller ID which says John and starts to panic. He left this call and the two following unanswered. 

Then John text him:  _ Hey Sherlock, I know it’s been a while, I’m sorry for not having been in contact lately, but I was wondering what you were up to?  _

Sherlock stares at his phone for long minutes, letting his tea go cold. He doesn’t know what to reply or even if he should, because surely then John would want to see him and he will notice something is wrong. 

A second text comes:  _ You’re probably on a case, I should have known. Call me or text me if you prefer, when you get this, ok? Maybe I could come to help you on a case sometimes if you’d like.  
_

And here it is, now John wants to see him, after three months of radio silence. Sherlock knows that even if it weren’t for the fact that he was pregnant with his best friend’s baby, or for the fact that the last time they really share a moment together, they ended up having sex, it would be awkward but now the situation would be even worse. So he doesn’t answer these texts either. 


	5. Chapter 5

The fourth month, he stops taking cases that require to leave his house, his belly is starting to show more and even though Scotland Yard are not very observant, they will become suspicious. 

“Sherlock, I have this case at Battersea.”

“Does it requires me leaving the house?”

“Well, I should think so, as you’re the one arguing when I come too late and have only photos to offer you.”

“In that case, I’ll pass Graham.”

“It’s Greg, Sherlock! And what are you on about?”

“I announce you that from this month I would not take any of your cases if he requires me to leave my house.”

“And why is that?” 

“None of your business, and it would do you and your agents some good, I think if you start solving cases on your own for a while.” 

“For a while, you don’t want to work with us anymore?”

“Not what I said, I can still consult but from the comfort of my house, send me some photos if you’re really stuck, but the rule of nothing less than a 7 still applies!”

“So you’re saying that as always you won’t accept any cases which are not at least a 7 and that you won’t actually come at the crime scene or the yard to solve them?”

“Glad you follow! Now, do you really need my help on this one?”

“Sherlock, what is it?”

“What is what?”

“Why you don’t want to leave your house anymore, aren’t you bored?”

“Not quite, no.”

“Sherlock, are you back on drugs?”

“No, I’m not! I’m just taking a break from your substandard cases, and concentrate on solving some interesting of my private ones.”

“Are you becoming a private detective then?”

“Not at all, I invented a job is not to take a boring one.”

“Well, it seems like it anyway!”

“I don’t care what you think! Do you or do you not need me on this one?”

“I think we’ll do without you thank you!”

“Then stop bothering me!”

“Maybe when you will stop behaving like a petulant child, I will actually consider taking you on cases again!”

“You’re not taking me on cases, you’re consulting me because you need me!”

“Well call me when you’ll be finished with your little whim, I don’t have time to deal with this now!”

“I’m sure you’ll be the one begging me to come to help you!”

“Sure! Just keep off the sweeties please Sherlock!”

“For the last time I’m not back on drugs!” he answers and hangs up. 

 

Of course, Mrs Hudson had noticed his growing belly, and is starting to ask him questions:

“Sherlock?”

“Hmm?”

“Have you finally started to feed yourself up correctly?”

“What brought this up Mrs Hudson?”

“Well I noticed that you actually put up a few pounds, these last few months, not that it doesn’t suit you, quite the contrary, you seem... healthier!”

“Hmm… I’m actually doing an experiment.” he lies 

“What sort of experiment now?”

“Don’t look at me like that, it’s probably one that you would, in fact, approve of!”

“Really?”

“Yes, I actually try to eat like you, normal people, following a strict schedule and all, and I’m estimating the effect on my brain work!”

“Really well, I’m glad that we finally put some sense in you! Have you come to any conclusions yet?”

“Well, I think you may have also noticed that I took fewer cases with the yard, so it’s clearly not working.”

“I thought the Detective Inspector said that it was your choice not to take as many cases anymore, with you not having your doctor by your side…”

“That as nothing to do with John, Mrs Hudson, I’m simply trying to help the yard by having them solving some cases by themselves for once, I won’t always be there to help them!”

“Why are you saying that now? Are you planning to leave?”

“I don’t know maybe…”

“Why?”

“Get a change of air, I don’t know… Can you leave me alone now, so I can finish my experiment in peace?”

“Really well, but that’s not the end of this conversation young man! Have you talked to John yet?”

“Not your business, and I’m sure you got other things to do, right?”

“Well actually…”

“Out! Now!”

“I really need to have a word with your mother now!”

“You can she understand very little!”

Mrs Hudson is not fooled, she had, of course, noticed that he seems to eat more regularly and healthier. What she doesn’t actually know is that it’s one of the doctor advice to keep the baby healthy, and Sherlock follows all of them rigorously. What’s troubling her is that even if she sometimes catches Sherlock smiling at himself when he thinks no one is looking, he doesn’t really seems at his best mentally, reducing his work hours, and not contacting John, can’t mean something good in her opinion, it seems rather strange for Sherlock to act this way.

 

One day after work, John tries to visit Sherlock, but as he is around the corner from Baker St, he starts to wonder if it’s a good idea. He feels guilty, it starts to wonder whether they had made a mistake, and Sherlock regrets it, if it’s maybe the reason why he is not answering any of his call or text. He has spent the first three months after his wedding trying to contact him, but he didn’t know what to say, and when he had finally get the nerves to contact Sherlock, the bastard hadn’t answered him. John had evaluated their situation, and for his part even if he feels guilty about it, he didn’t regret any of it, truth is sex with Mary has become dull after he had experienced sex with Sherlock, not that they had much, but he feels unsatisfied. He really is started to question if he has made the right choice when marrying Mary, but the fact that he doesn’t have any contact with Sherlock now made him think that he maybe didn’t have a choice to begin with, maybe Sherlock wouldn’t have wanted him anyway. Maybe their night of passion made him realise, that he was right when he said that he didn’t do relationship, even if or maybe because said relationship is with John. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come and say Hi on [ my Tumblr ](http://artsherlocked.tumblr.com/)  
> If you have requests or prompts you can contact me either through my Tumblr or by sending me an email at artsherlocked@gmail.com. I also started to do some fanart so you can ask for these too. 
> 
> Hope you like the story! Leave a kudo or comment to let me know :)


	6. Chapter 6

When the fifth month comes around, Sherlock knows he will have to get away from London and requests Mycroft and Mrs Hudson help. 

So that’s how he finds himself trying to tell Mrs Hudson the truth, during one usual quiet night at Baker St at the beginning of the month. 

“Mrs Hudson?”

“Yes dear?”

“Would you come up for a second, I need to ask you something?” he says suddenly nervous. 

“What is it dear? Are you alright?” replies Mrs Hudson obviously worried by his request and climbing up the stairs quicker than usual.

“Yeah, I’m fine, would you sit down here, I made a cup of tea.”

“You made tea? Something is definitely wrong with you!”

“Please Mrs Hudson, I know how to make a cup of tea, and I’ve got something important to tell you, so if you please stop interrupting me from now on, I could maybe come to the point!”

“Well, what is it then?” she says as she grabs the cup of tea, Sherlock is offering to her. 

“I think you have remarked that I gained some weight in the last couple of month.”

“Yes, I even made a remark about it dear, but don’t you worry, you really needed it.”

“Yeah, well, that’s not the point, the thing is… Some men in my family have some sort of condition, a capacity to become pregnant… And…” he says biting his lower lip and trying to gauge Mrs Hudson’s reaction. “I happen to also have this capacity…”

“You’re telling me that the reason why you were putting some weight is because you were pregnant?”

Thank god Mrs Hudson is not entirely an idiot and isn’t slow to understand. 

“Yes.”

“Is it John’s?”

“Obviously, have you ever seen me in another relationship.”

“Right, have you tell him?”

“Of course not!”

“Why?”

“Because, maybe as you apparently forgot, he actually happened to marry a woman five month ago!”

“I know that the situation is not ideal, but I rather think that he would like to know.”

“And I rather think that he shouldn’t! He said it himself, the night we shared was just a one-time thing, and that didn’t mean anything!”

“That was before this night led to you conceiving a child out of it!”

“I don’t see how this is changing anything! Anyway, I decided to not let him know, not let anyone know actually, well except for you and Mycroft. I plan to leave London for awhile.”

“Oh! How long?”

“I’m not sure yet, until the birth that’s for sure, and then I don’t know, maybe I'll be away a little while longer.”

“But where are you going then?”

“I haven’t decided yet, I need Mycroft help, probably to my parents until the baby is born and then I’ll probably need to find a place somewhere.”

“Why would you not be coming back to London, when the baby is born?”

“Can’t, John would know then…”

“You can’t actually hide it from him forever.”

“In fact, I can and I will, by staying as far from him as possible, this way he’ll never know…”

“What about your work? Aren’t you afraid to get bored without all your cases?”

“I’ll still take some private case which doesn’t require leaving my house too much, and from what I read, with a baby to take care of I won’t be bored.”

“I see you’ve got everything planned then, nothing to do to change your mind.”

“Not everything planned, but most of it yeah, believe me, Mrs Hudson, it’s for the best.”

“Would I be able to see you and the baby?”

“Well I supposed you could come and visit us, but as I said I won’t risk returning to London too much.” 

“And when are you leaving?”

“I’m not sure yet, still need to tell Mycroft, but probably within a week, I’ll try to arrange with my brother that all my things be removed from here before the end of the month, so you could rent it again of course.”

“Oh don’t bother with this, I don’t think I would want another tenant anyway.”

“But what about the rent?”

“Sherlock, you went away for two years, and John wasn’t there either for the most part of them, and I survived just fine!”

“Didn’t Mycroft continue to pay the rent while I was away?”

“He tried, but I refused it. Truth is I don’t really need the money anymore, I just like having you around.”

Sherlock seems to freeze like the time when John asked him to be is best man, his eyes continuing to blink.

“Sherlock? Are you alright?”

“You mean you actually like me?”

“Of course Sherlock, you’re like a son to me, that’s why I’m so sad to see you go.”

“I like you to Mrs Hudson. I mean if you were anyone else, you would have probably thrown me out of the flat by now. I know I’m not the best tenant, with all my experiments gone wrong and my "bored" moments.”

“I wouldn’t have you any other way dear.” she chuckles. 

“I’m sorry I have to leave Mrs Hudson, I’ll miss you and I’ll miss Baker St... this…” he says looking around him “feels like home...”

“Sherlock, know that no one will ever prevent you to come back if you feel like it, you know, maybe you should take some time away and when you’re ready, come back.”

“I wish I could…”

“I think you need some time to think about it, but know that you and your baby would always be welcome here. Who knows, we could always turn John’s bedroom into a nice nursery for the little one.”

“What if he comes back?”

“If he comes back, I don’t think you would need two bedrooms anymore.” she smiles.  

“While I appreciate your optimism, I don’t think that would ever happen.”

“Live and let live that is my motto.”

“Thank you Mrs Hudson.”

“Whenever, my dear. I leave you to sleep now. Goodnight Sherlock.”

“Goodnight Mrs Hudson.”

 

The next day he goes to see his brother. 

“Dear God! What have you done now Sherlock?”

“I think you’ve probably already deduced it, but let me spell it out anyway, I’m pregnant and I need your help to escape London.”

“Why do you need to leave London?”

“I don’t want John to know about it.”

“So our dear Doctor is the father I presume.”

“Obviously!”

“Why on earth, would you choose to have a child with a married man?”

“Obviously, I didn’t plan for it to happen! I didn’t even think that was possible... though not you apparently! You don’t seem surprised. How long did you know?”

“Know what?”

“That masgravida runs in the family?”

“Uncle William, your godfather had it, though he and his child died, when you were quite young.”

“Died?” asks Sherlock suddenly panicking that something could go wrong for him as well “How?”

“Car accident. Now why on earth you want to keep this baby Sherlock?”

“Because it’s mine!”

“Don’t be such a child Sherlock, you know that the best way to deal with this would have been to get an abortion!”

“No!” replies Sherlock subconsciously covering his belly and getting protective.

“You’re being irresponsible! How do you plan to take care of a child when you can’t even take care of yourself!”

“I definitely learn to take care of myself now, I’m not a child anymore Mycroft, and you can say what you want, that won’t change my decision to keep the child, and it’s rather too late to get an abortion now anyway!”

“Of course, though I believe you can still leave them to an orphanage to be adopted, I certainly can find one really well reputed…”

“Go to hell Mycroft! If you think that I would abandon my child, you’re really a heartless big brother!”

“Oh and since when you have a heart brother mine?”

“I always had one just like you, though now I’m not a complete coward to not acknowledge it like you.”

“The hormones are really getting into you aren’t they?”

“Fuck off Mycroft! You know what, I don’t need your help anymore, I’ll find a solution by myself!”

Sherlock strode out of his office angrier than Mycroft had ever seen him. That’s when Mycroft realises that he had probably underestimated how much important was this to his brother, certainly due to the paternity of the child.

 

After a few days Mycroft comes to Baker St to apologise. He offers the best help he can, providing Sherlock with a drive to their parents and all commodity taken care of until the birth of the child, with the best clinic quite close to their parents house, and Mr. Cooper, his gynecologist transferred there to assist him until the birth. Sherlock is still furious but accept it. 

 

While Sherlock is planning his escape from London, John and Mary drift further apart as John’s mind seems to always be somewhere else, thinking more and more that even though Sherlock and he agreed that their night of passion didn’t mean anything, it did. Because he knows that he always felt something for Sherlock and that he had always wanted a bit more with him, and now that he had a taste of it, he can’t let it go from his mind. 

Mary is suspecting something, she thinks John might be having an affair, and starts to spy on him. John tries to contact Sherlock again, but as always he doesn’t answer. 

He then tries to call Mrs Hudson, as he feels that if he goes to Baker St, Mary might discover the truth. 

“Hello?”

“Mrs H., this is John.”

“Oh hi dear, so nice to hear from you, how are you?”

“Well, to be honest I’ve seen better days…” he always felt quite comfortable talking to Mrs Hudson, he knows that he can be honest with her and she won’t judge him about it, and he thinks that she is quite capable to keep some things secret as well if the need arises.

“The married life doesn’t really suit you then?” she answers. 'Mrs Hudson always cutting straight to the point' thinks John, that also what he always liked about her.

“We can say that yeah… Truth is I miss solving cases with Sherlock…”

“You miss solving cases or you miss Sherlock?”

“Right, I’ll be honest with you, I miss Sherlock.”

“Then why you didn’t contact him?”

“I did, he isn’t answering any of my calls or texts… I just wanted to know... is he alright?”

“He is fine don’t worry I’m keeping an eye on him, I’ll talk him round to see why he isn’t answering you though.”

“Thanks Mrs Hudson.” and then he hears Mary opening their front door. “Sorry, got to go.”


	7. Chapter 7

At the beginning of his sixth month of pregnancy, it’s time for Sherlock to go to his parents. He leaves under the pretends to be on a difficult private case for a couple of months, to anyone who will ask. 

 

“Sherlock, I’m so glad to see you! Come here my boy.” says his mother as soon as he steps up of the car. He goes to hug her, and then his father. 

“Mycroft told us about the baby, we are so glad that we are going to be grandparents, I never thought we had this chance with you two.” says his mother. 

“Did you knew about the masgravida too?”

“Well, we knew that your father’s brother William had it but we could never imagine that you had it too. Anyway, come inside, you must be tired after the journey from London.”

“I’m alright mummy.”

 

After they sat down in the living room with a cup of tea, the questions that Sherlock had dreaded during all his travel from Baker St start. 

“So, how long have you been pregnant now?”

“Sixth month.”

“And everything is alright?”

“Yes, I mean, there are times when I’m especially tired or how Mrs Hudson like to say ‘emotional’, when I cry more than I care, for absolutely nothing, it is intolerable.”

“That’s fine, Sherly, it’s only the hormones, ask your father how I cried when I was pregnant, especially with you.”

“Really?” he says looking at his parents.  


“Sure, there were times that I had to sat there hopeless, seeing your mother cries and having absolutely no idea what to do.” answers his father chuckling a bit at his former hopelessness.

“So who is the father, Sherlock?” asks his mother then after a few seconds of silence.

“I don’t know…”

“Sherlock, don’t try to fool me, you know, I can tell when you’re lying, I’m your mother.” she reprimands.

“You know what, actually I’m tired.” Sherlock says putting his teacup away and standing up. He knew that this question was to come, that was one he dreaded the most but that didn’t mean that he had been prepared to answer.

“Sherlock, why don’t you want to tell me?”

“Because it doesn’t matter, he doesn’t know, and I don’t want him to know.” says Sherlock getting angry.

“And why is that?”

“Because, even if for me he means everything, and that the night we had share is probably by far the best of my life! For him he didn’t mean anything, it was a one-time thing, and since then we haven’t been in contact so, I don’t think he cares.” 

“How could you know if you haven’t told him? Is it John?”

“Goodnight!” he replies, definitely flying the room now. 

“Sherlock…” tried to call his mother, but he’s already up the stairs and had closed the door to his room. 

“It’s John, isn’t it?” asks his father.

“Obviously!” answers his mum.

“What are you gonna do?” 

“I don’t know yet, but we must talk some sense into him. I mean, I don’t say that he is not capable of taking care of this child alone, but we both know how demanding it can be, and it would simply be best if he had John with him.”

 

His parents are very happy to have him home and they cosset him like always, and even though he still refuses to tell them who the father is, they already figured it out. 

 

A couple of days later, Sherlock is sitting down next to some of his mother’s flower in the back garden. He is observing the bees working, gathering nectar. He had always like observing them since he was little, they were so fascinating, the way they work which could look like a real mess to anyone else but so well organised to the one who is not simply looking but observing. He was quite in a meditative state at the moment, gently caressing his belly and calming both himself and he hopes the little precious human growing inside of him. 

“I can’t wait to meet you, you know… I hope you will look like your father… not me I mean… your other dad, John… He is the bravest, kindest and wisest human being I ever had the good fortune of knowing” he chuckles a bit to himself but he’s reminded of his best man speech and swallow some tears as he remembers how sad he had felt to let him go, to see the wedding unfolding before his very eyes, everyone seemingly happy but him, every minute seeming to take John further away from Baker St, further away from their life together, further away from him. 

“I’m sorry that he’s not here with us… I do hope that someday you’ll be able to meet him too…” he feels the tears start to roll down his cheeks. “I promise that the reason he’s not here has nothing to do with you, it’s just because I’m simply not enough for him and never will be… I just hope that I will be enough for you… I promise to try to be the best dad for you, to always be there for you…” he sniffs a bit “I don’t really know how I’ll take care of you on my own but I’m sure we’ll figure it out, after all, you’re half Watson, I’m sure you’ll know how to be a bit patient with me, at least let’s hope so…” 

 

Mrs Holmes is cooking in the kitchen when she hears the phone rings. 

“Hello?”

“Hello, Mrs Holmes speaking?”

“Oh hello Violet, this is Martha Hudson, I was just calling to take some news of our boy. How is he?”

“He is rather well, spends most of his days outside reading in the garden, or observing the bees, I’m surprised he hasn’t gotten bored yet.” she chuckles.

“Well, that is some good news.”

“Has he told you who the father is Martha?”

“Yes, hasn’t he told you?”

“No, apparently he is afraid I would tell him, but his father and I both know that it’s John.”

“Well obviously, the poor boy has been in love with his doctor since the day they met. They were doing just fine before he faked his death and went away for two years, things haven’t been quite the same since then.”

“Oh don’t tell me about it, we were so worried that something might happen to him, how irresponsible of Myc to send him away like that.”

“I agree, but a couple of months ago they were doing better, going to solve cases together again, they were almost the same as before, but without John living here...”

“What? John isn’t living with him anymore?”

“No he hasn’t been since he moved out a couple of month after Sherlock supposed death, and then, of course, he went to live with Mary.”

“Mary? Who is Mary?”

“John’s wife, hasn’t Sherlock told you about it?”

“It appears that he forgot to tell us about these proceedings!”

“John got married six months ago, Sherlock was is best man, I actually don’t know how John hasn’t broken off his wedding after Sherlock’s speech, it was so moving…, the poor boy pours all of his heart…”

“Wait John got married six months ago, but Sherlock is six months pregnant? When did it happen?”

“The night of John’s stag night, a couple of days before the wedding.”

“And John didn’t change his mind after that?”

“The two idiots agreed that it didn’t mean anything, obviously it did, at least for Sherlock, but I’m quite sure it did mean something for John too.” 

“Well now I can understand why he doesn’t want to tell him, but still I think John should know.”

“As do I, but Sherlock was rather categorical about it, so…”

“I’ll try to talk to him. Actually, I think I can hear him coming back. it was nice talking to you Martha, I told him that you called. Bye.”

“Bye Violet.” 

 

Sherlock enters the kitchen and starts to make himself a cup of tea.

“Who was it?”

“What?”

“On the phone, who was it?”

“Oh, it was Martha Hudson, she just wanted to know how you were.”

“Nice of her.”

“She likes you, you know.”

“I know, she told me that I was almost like a son to her.” 

“I don’t doubt that, I’m rather glad she can keep an eye on you in London.”

“I’m not a child anymore, mum.”

“I know, it’s just reassuring to me to know that you had someone who cares about you not far.”

“I supposed it’s nice yeah…”

“Now, why you didn’t tell me John was married?” 

Sherlock swallows the lump in his throat, he promises himself to stop crying at any mention of John, especially if his name was in the same sentence with married, wedding or Mary. 

“I… I supposed I simply forgot...”

“I understand that it’s hard for you, Willy, I really do, but you should tell him about the baby, I think he has the right to know.”

“No I don’t want to tell John, our night together didn’t mean anything for him. It only happens because we were too drunk, I don’t even know if he remembers that something happens at all.”

“I’m sure he does, and anyway you can hide this child forever, one day he’ll learn about it.”

“Maybe, but it can wait. And as I told you, we didn’t have any contact since his wedding, I’m sure he doesn’t care about me anymore. He has all he had ever wanted, a nice little house in the suburbs with a nice little wife, and all the nice domesticity that goes with it.”

“As you want, but I still think that you should tell him.” 

He doesn’t tell her that he hadn’t been in contact with John because he had deliberately not been answering any of his calls and texts, panicking that he would discover the truth. and in the end, she lets the matter slides for the moment. 

 

Meanwhile, John is still determined to get in contact with Sherlock, as he misses him more than he would like to admit. He thinks that maybe if he goes to the yard, he can maybe catch him in the middle of a case, sure it would not be ideal but it’s better than not seeing him at all. 

When John arrives at the yard, he says hello to some officers and goes straight to Lestrade office and knocks on the door. 

“Yes, enter.”

“Hi Greg.”

“Hey John, how nice to see you, how is the wife?”

“Fine, I supposed. Have you by any chance seen Sherlock lately?”

“Sherlock, no not really, I think I haven’t seen him in like… two months I think. The bastard is taking some sort of holidays I supposed, he refuses to come to help us on cases anymore, he might email me or text me when I ask for some help, but he never comes in person now.”

“Why is that?”

“Don’t really know, though he says that he was concentrating on private cases for a while and won’t be able to help us, says that we should get used to it as he won’t always be there to help, I thought it was rather odd, but he seems fine last time I saw him, so I didn’t worry too much…”

“You think it might be back on drugs?”

“No, I don’t think so… Haven’t you seen him?”

“Not since the wedding, and now he won’t answer my calls or my texts, I’m getting worried.”

“Well, that is rather weird indeed. Have you tried to go and see him at Baker Street?”

“No, didn’t feel brave enough I suppose, but I think that now is time to pay him a visit.” 

“Say hi from me.”

“Sure, thanks Greg.”

 

After he exits the Yard, he takes a taxi straight to Baker St, and knocks on the door, even if he still has his key. Mrs Hudson opens the door. 

“John, how nice to see you!” she hugs him. 

“Hi, Mrs H. how are you? Is Sherlock here?”

“I’m afraid he isn’t no. He is on a case…”

“A case, what kind of case? I just talk to Greg who told me that he had stopped taking cases.”

“Yes, he had stopped taking cases for the yard, but this is a private one.”

“A private one? Will he be back tonight?”

“No, he is away from London for a couple of months…”

“Sherlock is working on the same case for a couple of months?!”

“It is a rather difficult one apparently…”

“Is it dangerous?”

“He didn’t tell me but I don’t think so, he is more careful these days.”

“Is he now? Do you know where is he exactly?”

“No, he didn’t tell me, you know how he is, just said that he should be back within a couple of months. Do you want to come and have a cuppa?”

“No, thanks, I should go to see Mary, I’ll come back later, tell me if you have any news, he isn’t answering any of my calls or texts and I’m getting worried.”

“Sure, once I’ll get to talk to him, I’ll ask him to call you.”

“Thanks a lot, Mrs Hudson. See you.”

“Bye John.”  



	8. Chapter 8

The seventh month of his pregnancy is rather the same as the previous one for Sherlock. He stays at his parents, and does his monthly visits at the very nice clinic that Mycroft had found him, near their parents cottage, where he plans to give birth.

“Mr Holmes! How are you today?”

“Fine, I supposed, though I’m feeling like I have a lack of energy sometimes, and the hormones make me rather emotional I don’t like it!”

“This is perfectly normal Mr Holmes, I can assure you. You’re seven-month pregnant, so it is normal to be a little bit more tired than usual, you should take all the rest you can, you deserve it.”

“But that’s the thing, I’m not doing anything, I’m reading and taking walks around my parents’ house, nothing that requires too much energy, and I still feel as tired as if I ran around London all day long!”

“Well, I’m gonna check your blood pressure to make sure that everything is fine, but I’m pretty sure this is nothing to be worried about. And today we’re gonna do a second ultrasound to check if everything is alright with the little one too, ok?”

“Fine.”

“Well as I suspected nothing wrong with the lack of energy, your blood pressure is normal. Now let’s do the ultrasound. Lie down on this chair, and unbutton your shirt please.”

“So, is everything alright with my child doctor?” Sherlock asks nervously after a few minutes, the doctor rubbing the transducer on his belly and examining the image on the screen.

“Perfectly alright, you have a very healthy child from what I can see. Now I would recommend to take all the rest you can for the next couple of months, and avoid if at all possible all things that can be causes of stress for you. The last months are the most difficult ones, especially in case of masgravida, my last patient who had a normal pregnancy for the first seven months had started to have complications from the seventh month and a half and the baby came 3 weeks early. So I recommend to be careful and to follow these pieces of advices, rest and avoid stress.”

“Am I at risk of these complications Doctor?”

“Masgravida is still a rare condition and we don’t have enough data to predict accurately who’s at risk and who is not, so even if with the pregnancy you had until now I would be inclined to say no, I prefer to be cautious.”

“What are these complications exactly? Is the baby in danger?”

“There are very few cases when the baby had been in real danger, even with my last patient whose baby came three weeks early, he had been healthy. So I would not worry about that, as for the complications they are quite different from patient to patient, but most of the times they require the patient to stay in bed for the last weeks or sometimes months of the pregnancy, but these complications also happen in female pregnancy.”

“So to avoid any complications, the only thing I can do is rest, and avoid stress is that all?”

“Yes, and of course, continue to take care of yourself and the baby by taking regular meal and following a balanced diet.”

“Obviously! Thank you doctor.”

“My pleasure Mr. Holmes, but don’t worry too much about all of this, I’m sure everything will be fine.”

Once he gets out of his usual appointment, he is happy to know that everything is fine with the baby, even if he is a bit worried that something could go wrong. This last appointment also made him realise that he wish he could share all of this with John. Because John would know what to do to avoid all of these complications, John would take care of him and he wouldn’t be worried because he would know that as long as John would be here, everything would be fine.

But John isn’t here, and he isn’t sure that John cares about him anymore.

 

Two weeks after his first visit, John returned to Baker St.

“Hi Mrs Hudson!”

“John, dear, how are you?”

“Fine. I supposed Sherlock isn’t here?”

“No, he’s still on his case…”

“Do you know how long it will be until he comes back?”

“No, I don’t know.”

“I… Did you have news?”

“Yes, last time I checked he was alright.”

“He still isn’t answering any of my calls or texts, I don’t understand, I am really worried Mrs H.”

Mrs Hudson takes pity on him: “Come in here for a bit, I think we need to have a chat.”

Mrs Hudson, serves them a cup of tea, with a couple of biscuits.

“Has something happened to him? Why he isn’t answering me?” says John sitting down at the kitchen table.

“No, he’s fine John. I just think that he had to take some time away from London and the work.”

“But why? These are the things he likes the most!”

“I… John is not my place to say but your wedding has really disturbed him.”

“What? No, he was fine… he seemed fine at the wedding…”

“John, he left your wedding early! Your best friend! And you should have seen the sad look on his face the following days…”

“But why? Why me getting married would upset him?”

“I think you know why, after what happened during your stag night…”

“Wait, what?”

“I heard you John, as I said to Sherlock you weren’t really quiet…”

John blushes with embarrassment in a second.

“It’s fine John, I don’t judge you, I know that it would happen eventually, I wonder why it didn’t happen earlier to be honest.”

“How would you know it would happen?”

“Remember when you first came here to visit the flat?”

“Yeah you ask if we would be needing two bedrooms.” he chuckles.

“Exactly, I knew the moment I saw you at the door and how he was looking at you, that he was completely smitten with you. But you were not ready apparently.”

“Well I barely knew him, and I never really feel something like this for a man…”

“Does it really matter if he is a man?”

“I supposed not, but I was raised by a homophobic father who sent my sister packing once he learnt that her best friend Christine was actually a little more than a friend. So I supposed that it has stuck a bit with me.”

“I know that some people have a hard time accepting it, but that doesn’t mean that it’s bad or unnatural or anything that they would tell you.”

“Do you think he still likes me?”

“Do I?” she laughs “I think that it does not simply like you, dear, I think that he is in love with you, has been since the beginning if you ask me, that’s why it was so hard for him to accept you marrying someone else, especially after you two had sex.”

“I… It was just sex… I mean we agree it didn’t mean anything.”

“But that’s the thing you see because it did mean something, for him at least it did…”

“God, I’m such an idiot…”

“Well, I won’t contradict you young man!”

“This is why he no longer wants to talk to me then?”

“I don’t know the exact reasons why he isn’t speaking to you, but it might be, I think he might be a bit heartbroken, he thinks he lost you, not only has a boyfriend but as his friend too.”

“But that isn’t true!”

“I know dear, but you know how is Sherlock and how he has troubles dealing with his emotions.”

“Tell me honestly, is he planning to come back?”

“I’m not sure to be honest, I think that he’ll miss London, but I think he needs some time away right now, sorting these things out you know…”

“Is he really on a case?”

“Sort of…”

“Sort of? What does it mean?”

“John, I think I already told you more than I should have, so I can’t tell you more I’m sorry… All I can tell you is that you don’t have to worry, he has people looking after him and he is alright.”

“What people?”

“I can’t tell you…”

“For god’s sake why?”

“He doesn’t want you to know, any of this, but especially where he is or what he’s doing.”

“But… Is in danger? Did Mycroft send him away on another suicide mission or something? Because I swear I’ll kill him if something happened to Sherlock!”

“It’s not that John, I promise he is alright and safe, he just needs time on his own…”

“You’d tell me if something happened to him right?”

“Of course John, don’t worry, I’ll try to ask him to contact you again, I can’t promise anything but I can try…”

“Thank you Mrs H." Then after a few seconds of silence he says resigned: "I supposed I should go back to Mary’s.”

“Isn’t it your house too?”

“I… I supposed yes but it doesn’t feel like it… I don’t feel at home there…”

“Unlike you feel here, right?”

“I… Yes. Baker St would still feel a bit like home to me. Even when he wasn’t there anymore, I didn’t want to be anywhere else…”

“Then why did you move out?”

“I… I had to… I couldn’t continue on living like that… I was seeing him everywhere around the flat… I couldn’t let him go…”

“And now you can?”

“It’s not the same…”

“Maybe but if you don’t change things you might lose him again John…”

“What things? What did I do to deserve that treatment he is giving me exactly?”

“You offered yourself to him and then took everything back away, how would you feel in his position?”

“It was his idea! He promised that it wouldn’t mean anything, that it was a one-time thing and that we would be done after! I made no promise to him!”

“You really think he believed that? He just said that to have a chance to have you, he knew it was probably his only chance!”

“Well if he didn’t abandon me for two years, pretended that he was dead, things might have taken another turn, but now it is what it is!”

“I know that you’re still cross with him for that, and I was too, but he did it for us! To save us! And from what I heard it wasn’t the nicest years of his life for him either!”

“Do you know what happened? When he was away?”

“I don’t know, but what I know is that it changed him! And that it must be terrible things if he doesn’t want to talk about it!”

“I wanted to ask him… I felt his scars when… But it wasn’t the moment, and then I didn’t have the chance…”

“You still have the chance John…”

“How? He doesn’t want to talk to me anymore! What should I do?”

“John, I’m gonna ask you something, and please be honest with me, I won’t judge and I won’t tell, but are you truly happy with Mary?”

“I… Not really, I try to tell myself that we just had to adjust to married life, that it might take some time but… truth is since Sherlock came back, since we got to solve cases together again, I knew that I can’t really be satisfied with the nice little life in the suburbs with Mary… It’s not her fault, but I miss the adrenaline that comes with living with Sherlock… but I made a choice, I made a vow to her now… I can’t...”

“John, you have the right to be happy. We all make mistakes. You have the right to want out of this wedding if you feel miserable, believe me, I know from experience, that it doesn’t matter if we said yes at a precise moment at the altar and believe that we had made the right decision, we still get the right to change our mind too! That’s why divorce exist! And believe me, it’s easier than to get your husband executed to free yourself from an abusive relationship!”

“I’m sorry I never ask what happened to you.”

“This is not the issue, it’s in the past John. What I’m trying to tell you is that you have the right to be happy and Mary as well, I think she is nice enough to deserve someone who truly loves her, and pardon me but I don’t think you do...”

“No you’re right, I did love her at one point but I don’t think I do anymore…”

“And it’s fine John, it’s all fine but if you want to have the chance to be happy you need to be the one to make the changes that it takes to…”

“You’re saying that I should ask for a divorce?”

“I don’t know, John, I think you and Mary need to talk about it, see where you both stand, how does she feels, but if you two come to the conclusion that you are not happy in this wedding than I think it’s worth thinking about it.”

“And what about Sherlock?”

“When you’ll know what you truly want, I think he’ll come round, but you should sort things out too before you talk to him again.”

“Are you sure it’s not too late?”

“I can’t be certain, but if you don’t try you’ll never know… And the longer you wait the harder it will become…”

“I… You’re right, I’m gonna talk to Mary. Ta for everything Mrs Hudson!”

“You’re welcome dear, I just want to see you two happy, and I know that you’re capable to make each other happy if only you’d try!”

“Would you told me if you have news again?”

“Sure, but you have nothing to worry about, he’s fine I promise.”

“Ta, I should go now, see you.”

“See you around, John. And don’t forget you’re welcome anytime you like! And if you need a place to stay if things with Mary turn badly, remember that I still have one bedroom unoccupied upstairs.” she smiles, John chuckles.

“Ta, I’ll think about it, Goodbye Mrs Hudson.”

“Goodbye John, take care of yourself.”

“You too.”

 

When the door closes behind him, John takes a deep breath and thinks to himself that maybe Mrs Hudson is right, maybe it’s time for things to change, maybe it’s time to let himself be happy. He decides that tonight, he’ll talk with Mary.


	9. Chapter 9

The eighth month, complications occur and Sherlock has to stay at the clinic, the doctors think that it would be better if he stays immobilised though they suspect that the baby would probably come a few weeks in advance. 

Sherlock is a bit panicking and wonders what he did wrong:

“I knew I shouldn’t have taken these stupid cases at the beginning. That’s Lestrade fault! He and his imbecile officers at Scotland Yard!”

“Sherlock, calm down, it’s not your fault, and it’s certainly not the D.I. Gregory fault either, these are things that happen. Sometimes there are complications, even in a “normal” pregnancy.”

“But what if something happens to the baby mum, what if I did something wrong and I lose it.”

“Sherlock, stop blaming yourself, everything is back to normal, and the baby is fine, you just need to be patient and stay in bed for a couple of weeks, until the baby comes.”

“Your mother is right Mr Holmes, these are things that happen and you did nothing wrong! And now you’ll continue to do nothing wrong by simply taking some rest. You and the baby need it, ok? And please do try to avoid stress as well, don’t work yourself up, I promise you everything is fine, and your baby is still perfectly healthy.” said Dr. Cooper.

“You’re sure?” asks Sherlock still a bit panicked.

“Absolutely Mr. Holmes. I let you to rest for now, I’ll be back tomorrow to do some test, in the meantime if you need anything, don’t hesitate to press the button to call the nurses, ok?”

“Thank you doctor.”

“You’re welcome, see you tomorrow Mr Holmes.”

 

In the meantime in London, after a rather difficult discussion, where John had finally admitted to Mary that he still had feelings for Sherlock, Mary and John had decided to take a break. And that’s how once again, John sees himself knocking on the door of 221B Baker Street. 

“John? Is everything alright?” asks Mrs Hudson a bit worried when she saw the look on his face.

“Do your offer of the bedroom upstairs still stand?”

“Of course! Come inside, I’m gonna make you a cuppa, and you’re gonna tell me about what happened.”

“I followed your advice and talk to Mary…” John says, sitting at Mrs Hudson kitchen table, while she is making some tea. 

“I see, and how did it go?”

“Well, I’m here so I supposed not really well, we could say.”

“I’m sorry John.”

“No, you were right we needed to talk, but once we got going we couldn’t stop, and we said things that we might come to regret, though I doubt it…”

“What sort of things?” 

“I finally admitted to her, that I still had feelings for Sherlock, I didn’t tell her about the stag night of course, though I don’t think that it would have made a difference, as she admits that she cheated on me with David.”

“Who’s David?”

“Her ex-boyfriend, from what I understood, he was at our wedding, a blond guy.”

“And how do you feel about that?”

“That’s the thing, I’m not even angry at her if anything I feel a bit relieved, to be honest…”

“So what have you decided?”

“For now we are taking a break, but in the end, I think we might end up getting a divorce…”

“Well I’m sorry it has to end like that John, but maybe it’s for the best.”

“Yeah probably…”

 

The next day when John has left to work at the clinic, Mrs Hudson calls Sherlock.

“Hello Mrs Hudson.”

“Sherlock, my boy, how are you?”

“I’m feeling better, but there have been some complications and I’m required to stay put until the birth.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that Sherlock but you’re feeling better?”

“Yes I’m fine, bored out of my mind but at least the baby is ok.”

“I’m glad, maybe you can ask your Detective Inspector at Scotland Yard to send you some cold cases to work on, to occupy yourself.”

“I did and I already solve everything he sent me, I’m waiting for the next package.”

“Oh good luck Sherlock, at least it’s only a couple of weeks and then you’ll have the little one to occupy yourself with!”

“Yes! I can’t wait to meet this little baby, Mrs Hudson, I’m feeling a little foolish but I have never been so impatient in my whole life and you know that I’m not a patient man.”

“Yes, I know that! But it’s perfectly normal to be impatient and I can’t wait to come and visit you when you’ll have your baby.”

“I’ll be glad to see you. I miss you a bit…”

“I miss you too Sherlock, you know you can always change your mind about coming back to Baker St after the baby is born, I’ll be glad to have you around.”

“I don’t know, I don’t want John to know yet…”

“Talking about John, he is really worried Sherlock why don’t you answer his texts or his calls?”

“Because I’m scared he’ll discover the truth and I’m not ready to let him know.”

“Why not? I had a talk with him yesterday and… I was under the impression that your feelings might not be entirely unwelcome rather the contrary…”

“No, they are, John is not gay! He doesn’t feel things like that for me!”

“If he isn’t a bit gay then why did he have sex with you?”

“We were intoxicated, I’m sure he didn’t know what we were doing and he probably doesn’t remember…”

“Sherlock, don’t be stupid, you weren’t that drunk and I can tell you that John remembers, and he is worried that you don’t want to talk to him because of what happened!”

“It’s not the reason why... it just that… if I talked to him in the state that I am, I might say things that I come to regret because they will make him feel uncomfortable…”

“Do you mean telling him the truth for once, that that night truly meant something for you and that you might be in love with him?”

“Yeah, something like that…”

“He already knows that Sherlock.”

“What?”

“I told him.”

“You did what now?” And suddenly Sherlock panics and feels all his muscle clenching at once. And a pain growing inside his belly.

“Sherlock are you alright? Breathe! Calm down it’s o…” but he lets his phone falls to the floor and tries to press the red button next to his bed to call the nurses.

 

After the nurses came and he had finally relaxed, the doctor comes to check on him.

“Mr Holmes, what got you so worked up? I told you to avoid stress! It’s not good for the baby.”

He checks his blood pressure. “Still a bit high but it’s starting to come down. I advise you to rest a bit, maybe try to get some sleep.”

“Some sleep? But it’s the middle of the afternoon?”

“Exactly it’s an excellent time for a nap!”

“You’re serious???”

“Absolutely, you need to calm yourself down and the nap will do you some good, believe me, you feel more refreshed after!”

“If you think so…” he came to agree that this man is more an expert than him on this pregnancy thing and when he comes to the health of the baby it might be of good help. Indeed, actually having some experience with all of this makes him more trustworthy, so most of the time, Sherlock doesn’t argue much with him and his recommendations. After all, as they said only a fool argue with his doctor.

Mrs Hudson calls again but this time it’s Sherlock’s mother who answers as Sherlock, having followed his doctor’s advice, is asleep.

“Mrs Hudson, it’s Violet, Sherlock is sleeping.”

“Hi Violet, is he alright? I was worried, I were on the phone with him and suddenly I heard him sort of suffocating.”

“Yes he had a sort of panic attack but he is fine now. The doctor told him that he should avoid stress as it causes him some bellyache and other complications, and it’s not good for the baby.”

“Oh I’m sorry if our conversation distressed him, I should have known…”

“It’s ok Martha, what were you talking about?”

“It was about John.”

“Of course…”

“He doesn’t know about the pregnancy but he is worried about him. As Sherlock hasn’t answered any of his calls or texts for the last months.”

“He didn’t? But he told me that John hasn’t been in contact since the wedding.”

“It’s false, John has tried to contact him for almost 5 months now but apparently Sherlock refuses to answer him. He is afraid that John will discover he’s pregnant and he fears his reaction.”

“And what his reaction would be?”

“I can’t know for sure but I think he’ll be very happy. The thing is, he isn’t happy about his wedding. He and his wife are taking a break at the moment… and he is living back at Baker St for a bit…”

“Really? Does Sherlock knows?”

“No I was going to tell him but I didn’t have the chance, but I think it would be better if John would be the one telling him anyway.”

“You’re right! They should sort things out together! I’ll try to talk him round to contact John.”

“That’ll be wonderful, the poor man is truly worried about him, he is always asking me if I got some news and whether he is alright or not?”

“I understand I’ll see what I can do. Ah, I think he’s waking up, I’ll talk to you later ok?”

“Sure, goodbye Violet”

“Goodbye Martha!”

 

Once Sherlock has truly woken up, his mother tries to bring the subject of John into their conversation.

“Martha Hudson called earlier when you were asleep, she was wondering how you were?”

“Did you reassured her that I was fine now?”

“Yes, don’t worry, she also told me about John… Sherlock, why haven’t you answer him? He is worried about you, you know?”

“I know and I’m sorry but I don’t want him to know about the baby, not yet…”

“Why?”

“Because then John will feel guilty and I don’t want to break his marriage with Mary because I know he is happy with her.”

“You’re sure about that?”

“Yes! And anyway, I’ll never be good enough for John! He deserves someone better than me...”

“You’re an idiot to think things like that! Where does that come from? John should be lucky to have you, especially now that you are carrying his child!”

“He already made his choice mummy and he chose her not me, okay? So it doesn’t matter if I love him or if I’m carrying our child! This baby is the only thing that I’ll ever get from him!”

“Have you ever consider that you might be wrong about this? You know people make mistakes, sometimes they don’t choose the right person for them… Tell me Sherlock, if the role were reverse wouldn’t you want to know that John was carrying your child?”

“I… I don’t know…”

“Talk to him Sherlock, I’m sure it’ll make you feel better. And if you’re not ready, then don’t tell him about the baby yet but you need to reassure the poor man that you’re alright!”

“Ok… I..I will.”

“Great, well visiting hours are finished for today so I’ll go back to the house, but I’ll come back tomorrow, do you need anything?”

“I… Maybe you can bring me back my books on anthophilae? I could do with some more readings as I get bored during the days…”

“Sure!”


	10. Chapter 10

Later that night when Sherlock is finally alone and done with nurses checking up on him, he decides that it’s time to face John.

“Hello?”

“Sherlock! Thank god! Are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine, John.”

“I was so worried Sherlock, what happened to you?”

“Nothing happened to me I just needed some time away.”

“But why haven’t you returned any of my calls or texts? Did I do something wrong?”

“No, it’s just that I didn’t want to intrude in your new married life with Mary. I didn’t want to be a bother.” Sherlock lies.

“Sherlock it’s not an intrusion when I’m the one who initiated the contact in the first place. And you’re never a bother! It’s not because I’m married now that I can’t spend time with my best friend!”

“Am I still your best friend though?”

“Yes, of course, you are Sherlock. What are you on about?”

“I… It just that I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable after what happen at your stag night…” he says slowly caressing unconsciously his belly.

“I see… Sherlock, I’m sorry but I have to ask… did it truly mean nothing for you?”

“It depends did it mean something for you?”

“To be honest yes it did. Nothing has been the same since that night… I mean me and Mary weren’t the perfect couple we had our differences, but it never was a problem before…”

“What do you mean? Is everything alright with Mary?” asks Sherlock worried.

“Sherlock… Mary and I are taking a break, I’m back at Baker St, for the time being, Mrs Hudson offered and I didn’t know where else to go… I hope it’s ok?”

“Of course John, you’ll always be welcome at Baker St! And I’m sorry about Mary…”

“Don’t be, it’s for the best I think, after the wedding, we sort of drifted apart… She also confessed that she cheated on me with David…”

“The bastard, I warned him to stay away from you and Mary, I told him that if he were to see Mary it should be on your presence only and…”

“What?”

“I knew that he was still interested in Mary and that he could surely be a threat to your wedding so I did the same that I did with any other threat I take it away! Or at least I tried…”

“Sherlock you didn’t have to do that. I can only imagine how you must have scared the poor man.” he laughs.

“Apparently not enough! It’s not funny John!”

“It’s fine Sherlock, you know I’m not even angry at her, it’s like I knew it and I was relieved to see that I wasn’t the only one who is unhappy with this wedding.”

“What do you mean, you’re unhappy?”

“Yes I think I made a mistake, and I must warn you that we might get a divorce, I’m thinking about it and I’m sure she does too.”

“I’m so sorry John…”

“Why? It’s not your fault, it has nothing to do with what happened between us if that’s you’re thinking. Mary and I are simply not meant to be together!”

“Still I’m sorry you didn’t get to have what you always wanted John…”

“I’m not sure what I want anymore… The only thing I know is that it feels good to be back here at Baker St… Will it be okay, if I were to move back in here with you on a more permanent basis after the divorce?”

“You might want to reconsider this if I come back, things won’t be the same…”

“Why are you saying this?”

“I… I can’t tell you now… I’m sorry… I had to go…”

“Sherlock wait! Can I call you back later?”

“Maybe…”

“It’s just, it feels so good to get to talk to you, I don’t want to go back to this radio silence between us…”

“Sure, talk to you later, goodbye John”

“Goodbye Sherlock.”

And if they both had tears in their eyes when they hang up none of them said anything about it.

John calls him again the next couple of days, just to have some news, they don’t really talk about the fact that things would change again, John is waiting for Sherlock to be ready to tell him.

John is telling him that he is filling the divorce papers when the contractions start.

Sherlock screams in pain

“Sherlock? You’re okay? What was that?”

“I’m fine John” he says between clenched teeth trying to sit up a bit more to press the button next to his bed. “Sorry got to go!”

“No wait…” John starts but Sherlock had already hung up, now pressing frantically on the button to call the nurses and the doctor.  

John really worried calls him again and again.

But Sherlock is already in labour.

A couple of hours later Sherlock had given birth to their child and he is too tired to remember to call John, he falls asleep watching his daughter next to his bed.


	11. Chapter 11

The next day, the nurses come to take his daughter in order to run a couple of more tests for which apparently Sherlock can’t be present even if he insists, so to take his mind off things, he decides to call John. 

“Sherlock, you’re alright?”

“I’m fine, I’m sorry for yesterday, it’s just something important had happened for the case that I’m working on, I just had to go.”

“I know you’re lying Sherlock! I heard you scream in pain, what happened? Are you alright? Are you hurt?” asks John concerned.

And Sherlock so stressed about the test, and still recovering from giving birth to their daughter starts to cry, getting John even more worried. 

“Sherlock, what is it? Are you hurt?” asks John, again and again, trying to understand what is happening but all he gets in return are sobs. 

Sherlock’s mother enters the bedroom deciding on this moment to pay a visit to her son and granddaughter. As soon as she sees the state of her son, she quickly goes to him, grabs his phone and takes him in her arms. She presses her ear against the phone and hears John concerned asking what happened.

“John? It’s Violet Holmes.”

“Mrs Holmes, what happened to Sherlock?”

“Nothing, he’s alright, he’s just a bit tired, you know, recovering. You should call him back a bit later.”

“Recovering? Recovering from what?” asks John really worried. 

She looks at Sherlock who looks at her shaking his head. 

“You still hadn’t told him?” she asks her son and Sherlock answers with a small no. 

“Tell me what for god’s sake?” John says over the phone. 

She tries to cover the phone’s microphone so John can’t hear their conversation and asks in a low voice: “Are you planning to tell him?” 

“Yes but not now.” he replies.

“As you want.” she says uncovering the microphone to speak to John “I’m sorry John, Sherlock is fine, don’t worry, he is a bit emotional at the moment, that’s all…” Sherlock sneers at her, “but he is absolutely fine, no need to worry, he’ll call you back later.”

 

‘Sherlock emotional?’ John wonders what happened and spends the day all worried, asking again and again to Mrs Hudson, if she knows anything, she is quite ready to tell him, but thinks it’s not her role and pretends that she had to visit her sister to escape the interrogation. 

John tries to call Lestrade, but he says that he doesn’t know anything, and haven’t been in contact with Sherlock lately, apart from a few exchanges on some cold cases that he sent to Sherlock. The only thing, he knows is that he is resting somewhere in the countryside.

 

[Back to Sherlock hospital room]

Violet Holmes is still holding her crying son in her arms.

“What’s wrong, darling?”

“They’ve taken her mommy, I don’t know why? Is something wrong with her? I couldn’t follow them, they forbid me, they say that they would tie me to the bed if I continue to insist. So, I tried to take my mind off things… I called John, but I can’t share my concerns with him as he doesn’t know anything, and I’m afraid to tell him… I’m scared mommy...”

“Sherlock, the tests are normal, it’s the normal procedure, everything is alright with your daughter, they’ll bring her back in a moment, I promise! And regarding John, I heard from Mrs Hudson that he is divorcing, so you don’t need to worry about destroying his marriage anymore, plus that means he is single again so, why are you still worried?”

“I’m afraid John would be angry that I kept the child, and that either he would feel trap of staying with me even if he doesn’t want to or that he will abandon me and never speaks to me ever again.”

“You want to know what I’m thinking? I think John would certainly be angry but for different reasons, like not having the chance to be there during your pregnancy or having missed the birth of his child.” 

And Sherlock starts to cry again, at this moment, the nurse enters his room to bring his daughter back and he takes her immediately in his arms, snuggling her, and telling over and over that he is sorry. 

Her mother talks with the doctor as Sherlock is busy muttering to his daughter and doesn’t listen to a single thing he is saying. He informed her that everything is quite alright and if Sherlock is ready, he could leave the clinic in 3 days, and then he leaves the room.

His mother turns and asks him: “Who are you saying sorry to, your daughter or John.”

“Both!” Sherlock answers tears still falling “She's just been born and I already failed her, I deprived her of her dad! You’re right, John will hate me for not letting him be here!”  And he cries again snuggling his daughter in his arm. 

“Sherlock calm down, you haven’t failed her, it’s not too late to tell him you know?”

“How would you know?”

“Come on lie down in your bed with your daughter, you need to rest to clear up your mind.”

“I’m not tired!” he says but still follows her advice. After a while, he and his daughter both fall asleep in each other arms, and she took her granddaughter to put her down in her crib, with a little resistance from her son who has trouble letting her go even in his sleep. Then she places a kiss on both of their heads, and whispered: “I’m going to make it better.”


	12. Chapter 12

She goes in the hallway and calls John. 

“John? This is Violet Holmes.”

“Mrs Holmes? How is Sherlock?”

“He is fine dear, he is sleeping at the moment, he was a bit tired. John, I need to tell you something, but first I need you to sit down because it might be a bit of a shock to you. “

“What is it?” asks John worried

“Are you sitting down?” 

“Yes.” 

“John, you must remember what happened between you and my son on your stag night?”

“Oh god, he told you?”

“Don’t worry, I don’t know the detail and I don’t want to know. He told me that you were both quite drunk and that you probably regret it.”

“That’s not entirely true.” 

“You do not regret it then?”

“No, but what has it to do with anything?”

“You see there is a thing that runs in the family and, don’t be angry at Sherlock he didn’t know until he discovered that he had it too a couple of months ago.”

“What is it? Is he sick?”

“No dear. You see some men in our family has the rare capacity of carrying a child.” 

“What?” 

“I know most people don’t know that it is possible, as it is quite rare…”

“Are you telling me that Sherlock is pregnant?” 

“Was in fact…”

“Oh...did he lose the baby…?”

“No, he delivers her yesterday actually, went into labour when you were on the phone with him I believe. She is quite healthy, and as I told you he is perfectly fine too.“

“And am I… am I the.... father?” 

“Yes John.” 

“Are you sure?”

“Come on John, you know him, you’re probably the only one he had ever had sex with…”

“But… why hasn’t he told me anything?”

“He was afraid dear… and I know that he can’t get quite stupid when he is insecure… the thing is he didn’t want you to feel guilty about it, and he didn’t want to break your marriage but as I heard it is already done…” 

“Yeah Mary and I are getting a divorce, but I don’t understand why he didn’t tell me this when I told him that I was divorcing her…”

“He’s still afraid John. He is afraid that you don’t want this child, or him for that matter, he is afraid of losing you completely…”

“How could I not want my child or him?”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell him, but he is now afraid that you will be angry at him, for not letting you be there during his pregnancy or during her birth. And I think that all this worrying has last long enough now… He needs emotional support John… He is really emotional at the moment due to the pregnancy hormones and all this stress is not good for him…”

“I agree.” 

“John, if you really love my son and you are ready to take care of this beautiful princess with him, please come and see them.” 

“Where is he?”

“Primrose clinic, I’ll send you the address.”

“Thank you, Mrs Holmes, I’m grabbing a bag and I‘ll be there as soon as I can.”

 

“Mrs Hudson!” yelled John 

“Yes dear?” she replies climbing up the stairs

“Do you want to come with me to meet my child?” he says with a grin, thinking he would surprise her.  


“Oh! He has finally told you!” she says taking him in a hug.

“You knew?” he replies confused.  


“Yes but he made me promise to not say anything, he was so hard to keep the secret John! I'm sorry I couldn't tell you and I don’t know much, apart from the fact that the child was born yesterday, I think, I don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl.” 

“It’s a girl apparently!” says John smiling and running upstairs grabbing his bag of stuff, already made as he hasn’t taken much out since coming to Baker St. He comes back quickly downstairs. “How long would it takes you to be ready to go?” 

“Oh, a couple of minutes to grab a change of clothes and a few other things.”

“Great, I’ll call a cab for in 20 minutes, I just need to go buy a little thing to offer her and then we'll go.”

“We can take my car if you want, it’ll be faster I think”

“Your car? Since when do you own a car?”

“Oh, there are many things you don’t know about me dear!” 

“I don’t doubt it, 20 minutes is it alright for you? 

“It’s perfect. Don’t want to let you wait any longer, don’t we?” 

“God no! I’m so excited to see them!” 

 

John runs to a little vintage toyshop a few streets away from Baker St. He always liked this little shop, with some toys reminding him of his own childhood sometimes at the window, but with some modern toys too. 

“Hello Mister, how can I help you?”

“I would like to buy a present for my daughter who is just born.” 

“Oh, congratulations! Have you got any idea, what you want to get her?” 

“Hmmm I don’t know, I was thinking maybe a cuddly toy?”

“Great, we have a great choice over here, all sort of animals.”

John took one look at the animals and see this cute little bee cuddly toy:  


He is immediately reminded of the bee poster hanging in Sherlock bedroom, he also thinks he had seen him read a lot of books on the subject, that’s perfect. 

“I’m going to take the bee please.”

“Excellent choice! I’ll make you a quick gift wrap. Any preference?” the seller asks showing different wrapping papers.

“The pink one would be great!” that shade of pink reminding him of their first case together. 

“Do you want me to write her name on it sir?” 

“Hmm no thanks, I will do it myself ta.” replies John ashamed of not having asked the name that Sherlock had gave her. 

 

He goes back to Baker Street and Mrs Hudson is waiting for him, leaning back against an orange Aston Martin. 

“This? This is your car?” asks John dumbfounded 

“Yes.”

“Well, it’ll sure be faster than the cab!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI I find this cute little bee cuddly toy on this website [here](https://vinegarhill.co.uk/products/frizzles-bee?variant=16466320228424).


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to thank you all for your support on this fic! Each kudo and comment I have received, have really warmed my heart and kept me going, encouraging me to continue to update this fic ❤❤❤ 
> 
> I'm really glad and happy that many people seem to like it! And I do hope you will enjoy this final chapter 😊

2 hours later they are parking in front of the clinic. 

“Nervous?”

“Yeah… a bit” 

“It’ll be fine dear!”

“I don’t think he knows that I’m here, it’s his mother who told me everything, she said that he was a bit of a mess because of the hormones and didn’t feel ready yet…”

“You know how he can be when it comes to emotions, doesn’t handle them well, I always said he feels too much… He'll probably be relieved to finally have you here, believe me, John, I have known him with and without you, and I can confidently say that he is better off with you, he needs you!”

John starts to tears up a bit “Ta Mrs Hudson!”

“Ready?”

“Yes! Let’s go meet my daughter!”

 

He enters the clinic and goes to the secretary. 

“Hello, I’m here to see Mr. Sherlock Holmes please.“

“Yes, are you family?”

“Hmm I’m his…”

“John! Finally you here!” John hears a familiar voice calling him 

“Hi Mrs Holmes!“

“Please, call me Violet, now that you’re my son in law! It’s fine Linda, this is John Watson, my son’s boyfriend and Martha Hudson a family friend.”

“Oh sorry Mrs Holmes, I didn’t know them.” says the secretary. 

“It’s alright. Come John, Sherlock must have woken up by now.“

“Hello John! How are you son?” Sherlock’s father greets him when they arrive at the door of what John deduces must be Sherlock’s room.

“I’m fine Mr Holmes, thank you.”

“Ready to meet the little monster then?”

“I guess…” says John smiling

“We let you then, come Violet, I think it’s time for our cup of tea.”

“I’ll join you if you don’t mind.” says Mrs Hudson to Sherlock’s parents “I don’t want to intrude on your reunion dear.” she adds to John who looks confused.

“You’re sure? You seemed pretty impatient to meet the baby too?” 

“I am, but I’ve waited 9 months to meet this little baby John, I can’t wait a couple more minutes. And this is your moment, you need some time alone with him I think.”

“You’re right! I can’t wait to see him, I missed him so much.” he tears up a bit.

“Oh my boy, it’s fine, you’re here now and he’s here just behind that door. It’ll all gonna be ok!” Mrs Hudson hugging him.

“Good luck John, I’m sure, he’ll be so happy to see you.” Mrs Holmes says brushing up his sleeve in her comforting gesture. 

“Come on ladies, let the boy alone now.” says Mr Holmes taking his wife and Mrs Hudson to the clinic’s cafeteria. 

 

John takes a deep breath and slowly opens the door. Sherlock is still asleep, though he begins to stir a little, so it shouldn’t be long before he wakes up. He puts the gift and his bag on the floor and goes to the crib. Looking at the small little girl with short but curly blond hair, a cute little nose, and some cupid bow lips that are certainly reminiscent of a certain detective.

He smiles and feels happy tears falling down his cheeks as he goes to touch her little hand and she immediately grabs onto his fingers. He is so concentrated on her that he hasn’t noticed that Sherlock has started to open his eyes. 

“John?” asks Sherlock a bit startled. 

“Hi sleepy head! How are you feeling?” he says turning towards him.

“I’m fine… I…What are you doing here? How? How did you know?” he mumbles.

“Your mother called, and told me everything.” he says sitting down on the bed at Sherlock’s knee. His daughter having finally let go of his finger. 

“I see… I’m sorry John, I should have told you, but I didn’t know how and then I panicked and…and…” says Sherlock starting to hyperventilate.

“Hey! Hey! That’s ok Sherlock, I’m not angry, I promise!” he says passing a hand in Sherlock’s hair in a soothing motion. 

“You’re sure? Because I know that what I did is not…“

“I said it’s fine Sherlock, of course, I would have liked to be here to help you through the pregnancy and see her comes to the world, but I’m here now, and I won’t waste any more time being away from you two, ok?” 

Sherlock sits up and crushes John into a big hug while crying on his chest. 

“Hey it’s fine, shh, shh” says John running a hand up and down Sherlock’s back.

“Stupid hormones!” says Sherlock between sobs, and John chuckles. 

When Sherlock’s sobs settle John turns his head towards the crib next to them. 

“So that’s her then? Our daughter?” 

“Yes… our little bee…” replies Sherlock while admiring their daughter.

“Already gave her a nickname I see.” 

“You don’t like it…” Sherlock smiles fades. 

“I love it Sherlock, and I think that this gift will perfectly fit her!” 

“You get her a gift?” asks Sherlock confused.

“Of course! And since I don’t think she’ll be able to open it on her own, maybe you could give her a hand.” 

“Certainly!” says Sherlock opening the package 

“John it’s…it’s a bee! How did you know?” says Sherlock with a big smile on his face.

“I knew you would like it, I know that you’re rather fond of them, I hope she is too!”

“John it’s perfect! Look here Willow what your daddy got you.” says Sherlock slowly taking the child in his arms and showing her the cuddly toy, it’s an anthophila, though maybe we can start by calling it a bee, might be easier for you to remember.” 

“So... you named her Willow?” 

“Yes, Willow Joanna Watson Holmes, Willow for my first name William, and Joanna for yours obviously but… if you don’t like it, I supposed we still could change it!” 

“No that’s perfect Sherlock!” says John smiling and happy tears in his eyes. 

“Do you want to hold her?” 

“Oh yes please!”

Sherlock slowly drops off the little girl in John’s waiting arms.

“God Sherlock, she is so beautiful!”

“She is, isn’t she? She has your nose and your blond hair, I’m not quite sure about her eyes though, they seemed a little peculiar… they always are changing colour…”

“Like yours!”

“Do my eyes really do that?”

“Yes, idiot! Now come here I want to kiss you!.... I mean if it’s ok of course!”

“Of course it is! Idiot!” Sherlock answers coming closer, hugging both his daughter and John and going to plant a kiss on John’s mouth.

“I can’t believe it! I’m a father… Sherlock…”

“Yes, you are!”

“I’m so happy!”

“Really? You’re not angry or anything?”

“Of course not!”

“You’re sure you want that, because you know if you don’t feel ready to have a child, you could still change your mind… I’ll take care of her…”

“Sherlock, of course, I want her, she is my daughter! I know I haven’t been here all these months that she grew inside you, and I only get to meet her now, but she’s still my daughter!”

“I’m sorry John, I just didn’t want to force her on you…”

“You’re not forcing anything Sherlock!”

“I supposed though that if you aren’t ready to be in some sort of relationship with me so soon after Mary, or simply don’t want to ever, it’s fine, it’s all fine, we could still raise her side by side but in a sort of friendship…”

“Sherlock are you listening to yourself? You’re ridiculous! I love you and I want you! Both of you, ok? So stop thinking now!”

“You… You love me?”

“Of course, of course I love you! I… I’m sorry for how I react after my stag night… I shouldn’t have married Mary…”

“But you love her…”

“No I don’t, I did love her before,but I knew, even at that point, that I didn’t love her anymore. But I was a coward and couldn’t see myself say no at the altar, though god knows that with you standing there I wanted to! I wanted to run away with you… I know I was a coward too when I leave you to wake up alone after the night we had share, but I was scared… Scared to face you and realise that that’s what I could have had if I didn’t propose to Mary…” 

They stay silent for a couple of seconds until Sherlock says quietly, almost shyly:

“You can have it now though… I mean if you still want to… I would be glad to get to wake up next to you!”

“Me too, Sherlock, god that’s all I want!” John says crying and Sherlock goes to hug him.

Their daughter stirs in John’s arms and starts to cry too.

“Oh, what is it? Why is she crying, Sherlock?”

“Shh it’s nothing, come and give her to me, she is probably hungry…”

“Oh!... I’m sorry to ask but how does it work then, do you make milk?”

“No, I don’t have the capacity really, and even if I could, some man can, it wouldn’t be enough to feed her properly… Can you press the button there? I’m going to ask the nurse if she can prepare a bottle.” 

Sherlock says rocking their daughter who starts to calm down a bit. 

 

A few minutes after the nurse enters and is a bit surprised to see someone new in Sherlock’s bedroom. 

“Mr. Holmes, you called, you need anything?”

“Yes, can you prepare my daughter a bottle, I think she is starting to be a bit hungry.”

“Sure, be there in a minute, does Dr Cooper came to see you today?”

“Not yet no.”

“He is going to come to tell you the results of the tests we ran on the little Willow this morning, don’t worry everything is perfectly fine!”

“Thank you for letting me know Samantha.”

“You’re welcome Mr Holmes, I’ll come back with a bottle.”

 

“Samantha?”

“I had been here for almost a month now, I learn their names, it kept me occupied for a while.”

“Really?”

“Well one or two days, I also know who is on shift when, and who is nicer.” they chuckle.

“And Samantha?”

“I think you could deduce with how I addressed her that she is one of the nicest.”

“Obviously, though for a moment I thought that the pregnancy as rendered you soft.”

“Don’t worry, that would definitely never happen!”

“Here is the bottle for the little Willow.” says nurse Samantha coming back and handing Sherlock the bottle of warm milk. 

“I’m sorry I don’t think we had been introduced?” she says turning to John a bit flirtatiously, and Sherlock clench his teeth, he wants to yell MINE! BACK OFF! but then John answers with his nicest charming smile: “Hi I’m John Watson, Sherlock’s boyfriend and the father of the little one here, nice to meet you.”

“Really? I’m so please to finally meet you Mr. Watson, congratulations you have a beautiful child.”

“Thank you, Samantha isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

“Thank you for having taking care of them when I couldn’t be here.”

“Well, I was only doing my work you know, Mr Watson.”

“Still thank you!”

 

She goes away a bit confused but smiling.

Sherlock had started to give Willow her bottle during the conversation and the little girl was sucking eagerly on it. 

“Are you planning to thank every nurse for doing their job?”

“Absolutely! Because with you as a patient I know it must not be easy.” he chuckles. “No, more seriously I’m glad they were there to keep you both healthy, I wish I could have been here…”

“I’m sorry John…”

“I know, and it’s fine Sherlock, I’m not angry, just a bit sad to not having been here for you through all of this, but from now on we’re in this together! No more secret, ok?”

“In that case, there’s something I should say, I meant to say always and then never had…”

“What is it?” says John a bit worried. 

“I’m in love you John Hamish Watson!” 

“Oh, Sherlock! I love you too!” 

“I know! You said it before but then I got distracted and I forgot to tell you… And I’m so glad we had this baby together.”

“Me too Sherlock, me too.” and he gently hugs Sherlock side to not disturb Willow in her meal. “She was indeed hungry, wasn’t she?”

“Well it’s true that she likes her food, I think that on that point, she may be more like you! Though I had started to eat a bit more during the pregnancy and came to see that it didn’t slow me down that much.” he chuckles.

“Well, that’s one more good news then!”

 

Mr and Mrs Holmes come back with Mrs Hudson. 

“Youhou!” says Mrs Hudson knocking and opening the door slightly. “Are you guys decent? Can I come to meet the little one?” 

“Mrs Hudson! Of course, come here!” says Sherlock with a big smile on his face, he did really miss his landlady. 

“Oh my boy! How are you?” she goes hugging him gently mindful of the little one quietly sleeping in his arms. 

“I’m ok Mrs Hudson, I’m ok… well, I’m even better since John’s here now.” he says smiling at John over her shoulder. 

“Oh I’m sure you are! You know I love you both but you really are two idiots! You got me all worried these past few months, with you keeping your secrets!” she says slapping Sherlock’s arm without any force. “And you getting all worried about him asking me millions of questions. I thought I’ll go crazy!”

“Sorry Mrs H.” “Sorry Mrs Hudson.” they says almost simultaneously like two little boys being reprimanded by their mother. 

“I’m so happy you finally figured it out though, took you long enough!” 

“I agree… after all you had seen it right at the beginning hadn’t you?” says Sherlock remembering the first time he’d bring John to Baker St to show him the flat. 

“Yes she did…” says John looking and smiling at Sherlock remembering the exact same moment. “Oh and Mrs Hudson I just would like to say that I will be moving back to Baker Street permanently and this time I think we would only need one bedroom!” 

“John don’t be absurd! We will still be needed two!” 

Everyone looks at him confused. 

“What? I’m only asking where Willow is going to sleep if we don’t take the room upstairs too?”

And they all laugh. 

“True, would you mind if we turn the room upstairs to her nursery then? Might need some painting…” John asks Mrs Hudson.

“Oh my boys, this flat is your home, you can do whatever arrangement you would like to make if it makes you stay! Except putting bullets in the wall young man!” she says before Sherlock as the time to retorts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the final chapter or is it? 
> 
> Since you guys seem to like this story as much as I am, and since I've still got a few ideas for this story, I might try to write 2 to 3 chapters more as a sort of epilogue. 
> 
> Let me know if you would be interested in the comments.


	14. Epilogue - Chapter 1: Willow meets her uncle Mycroft

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for all of your wonderful and encouraging comment, I tried to reply to all of them but I might have missed a few still so I'll try to answer them when I'll have a minute 😊
> 
> I will then write a few more chapters to this story exploring the dynamic between Sherlock and John and how they navigate parenthood - a few warnings to come, though nothing dangerous rest assured:  
> \- These chapters might be a bit out of order though probably not at the beginning - I might use some ellipsis and try to capture some moments in time if that makes sense  
> \- Nothing has been written in advance so updates will depend on how much I am able to write depending on my schedule  
> \- Some chapters might be a bit shorter than other 
> 
> As some of you had requested Willow to meet the other characters of the show I will probably start with these meetings first then write a few of my ideas 
> 
> I am open to suggestions so if you have some ideas that you would like me to explore with this story feel free to share them with me in the comments section 😉

“Hello mother.”

 

“Myc? How are you my boy?”

 

“I already told you a million time my name is Mycroft, not Myc or any of your ridiculous surname! And I’m fine. I was calling to enquire how is Sherlock? My report says that the child is born, it also says that Dr Watson has been seen leaving Baker St along with Mrs Hudson, might I deduce that the Doctor is now in the confidence?” 

 

“Yes, he is indeed Mycroft. He’s here with Sherlock and he and your brother are very happy!” 

 

“I’m glad that everything seems in order, I leave you to it then.”

 

“Mycroft, wait a minute, when are you coming to meet your niece?”

 

“There’s no need for me to meet her, I doubt that Sherlock would approve of my presence.”

 

“Don’t be stupid Mycroft, he’ll be glad to have you here, after all, you’re her uncle.”

 

“If he were for me she wouldn’t even be here today mother… I thought he was making a mistake… I have miscalculated, I thought Dr Watson wasn’t going to divorce his wife, so I suggest that he got an abortion or that he leaves her to an orphanage…”

 

“Mycroft!” says his mother shocked

 

“I know mother… It was a stupid idea, probably the stupidest I have ever had but I only wanted to protect him, I swear mother.”

 

“I know Mycroft and I’m glad that you’re looking after your small brother especially after his drugs problem but you have to accept that he is an adult now and he is capable of taking his own decisions and assume their consequences. Moreover, I think he finds himself a nice doctor to look after him now.”

 

“Yes this army doctor impresses me, I don’t know how Sherlock managed to keep him around really…”

 

“Love Mycroft, they simply love each other very much. That's how he keeps him around as you said. Speaking of love, have you told your detective yet?”

 

“Mother!” says Mycroft appalled

 

“You could be happy too, you know, if only you told him or do I have to intervene like for your brother?”

 

“Please don’t!” replies Mycroft a bit panicked  


 

“At 2 conditions.”

 

“2? It's usually 1 condition, you know.”

 

“Yes, but with you two boys I need more reassurance.”

 

“Right, so what are your conditions then?”

 

“Promise you’ll tell him before your father and I say our goodbye to this world.”

 

“Don’t say that.”

 

“You know that will happen Mycroft we aren’t immortal.”

 

“Yes, ok I promise, what is the second?”

 

“Come here at once to meet your niece!”

 

“You’re sure that Sherlock will let me?”

 

“He better be, this little girl deserves to meet her uncle! But you need to apologise for your stupid ideas!”

 

“I already did but I will once again, I will be there in 2 hours and 34 minutes.”

 

“Great, see you my boy!”

 

—

 

“What colour do you reckon for the nursery? I was thinking a light yellow, we could maybe even do a bee theme?” says John rocking Willow in his arms, in a chair next to Sherlock hospital bed.  


 

“John you simply read my mind!” replies Sherlock from his bed smiling as he watches the two people he loves the most in this world.

 

“It used to be the other way around!” John chuckles. 

 

They hear a gentle knock at the door.

 

“Yes?” says Sherlock

 

“Sherlock, Dr Watson.” says Mycroft greeting them.

 

“Don’t take her away Mycroft!” says Sherlock suddenly panicking “Don’t let him John!”

 

“Sherlock calms down, what are you talking about?” asks John placing a reassuring hand on Sherlock's arm.  


 

“I assure you that it’s not my intention Sherlock and I would like to apologise once more to ever suggesting it!”

 

“What are you talking about Mycroft?” says John cradling his daughter and growing suddenly protective at this exchange between the brothers.

 

“When Sherlock told me he was pregnant, I thought he wouldn’t be capable of taking care of this child and I stupidly suggested that he gave her away to an orphanage.”

 

“You what?”

 

“I’m sorry it was a stupid idea, I’m willing to admit it! And Sherlock, I’m really sorry for ever suggesting something so cruel even to our standards…”

 

“You really reach a new low on this one Mycroft!" starts John 

 

“What are you doing here Mycroft?” interrupts Sherlock

 

“I came to present my sincere apologies! And as mummy suggested to introduce myself to your child since she is my niece…”

 

“So now you’re pulling the family card?” sneers Sherlock

 

“I knew I won’t be welcome here… I apologise for the inconvenience and wish you all the best! To you three!” says Mycroft smiling softly to the child in John’s arm “She really is… beautiful.” he goes to leave the room feeling tears of regrets in his eyes

 

“Mycroft wait.” Sherlock, sensing his brother's distress and sincerity, interrupts him as he puts his hand on the handle “I believe that we may need your help.”

John looks at him confused.

 

“My help?” asks Mycroft.  


 

“As you said she is your niece and I thought that you might after some time bring yourself to care for her… and her wellbeing…”

 

“I assure you I already care for her, brother mine! And I deeply regret what I’ve said!”

 

“I know, and that’s why I would like to ask you to extend the resources you put to protect me, to her and John. After all, we live a dangerous life and she will need all the protection she can get!”

 

“I agree, brother mine! And it will be my honour to put all the resources that I can get to guarantee her protection.”

 

“You'll need to be careful Willow, looks like the Queen might get jealous of you as Mycroft seems to get you your own guards as a birthday present!” John says to Willow trying to lighten up the atmosphere.

 

Sherlock and Mycroft turn to him affronted but Sherlock seems to realise how stupid they may have sounded with all their pompousness… 

 

“I suggest a yellow outfit instead of the red, though they may keep the black hat, it will go well with the bee theme of the nursery!” replies Sherlock joining John on the joke and the two of them starts laughing, Mycroft looking at them confused to what just happened.

 

“Oh don’t look at us like that Mycroft and come say hello to your niece!” says John.

 

He slowly places her in Mycroft arms and says “Willow Joanna Watson Holmes let me introduce you to your uncle Mycroft!”

 

“Sherlock how did you manage to make this small human being?” says Mycroft in awe.

 

“Well, that's quite simple actually, first John kissed me and then we went to my bedroom and then he took out his penis and...”

 

“I don’t think he wants to hear the details darling…” says John bursting into laughter with Sherlock as they look at Mycroft appalled face.


	15. Epilogue - Chapter 2: Telling Molly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the long wait! I've been a bit busy these last few weeks and when I was sitting down to write I was feeling a bit uninspired or didn't quite know where to start. 
> 
> I was wondering if I should start a new series for these new chapters or keep calling them epilogue, let me know your thoughts in the comments?

It’s been a few weeks now since Willow is born and even though John and Sherlock have been busy trying to fit an infant into their new routines as a couple, John can tell that Sherlock is started to go mad staying inside of their flat.

“You should go out, have some fresh air.”

“What? Why?”

“I can see that your mind is started to go restless and staying inside is starting to drive you crazy.”

“But I’m not staying inside we’re taking a walk every day with Willow.”

“Yes, a walk around the park at the end of the road or around the blocks. It’s not really what I mean, I mean that you should go out, go see your friends who have missed you.”

“What friends?”

“Sherlock...”

“I know, it’s just how do I explain why I’ve been away?”

“Simply tell them the truth, we can’t hide her away forever you know… Especially now that we are here in Baker St again, they have to know.”

“Oh, because it's easy, I simply go see Molly enter the lab and say "Hello how are you? I know I’ve been away for half a year, got a child now and John and I are a couple." I can't...”

“Well I know it’s a lot of changes but honestly you and I, they have seen it coming so it shouldn’t come as a shock, though I agree that Willow might be a nice surprise.” he chuckles.

“Is it really that easy?”

“Well, I don’t see why it couldn’t be?”

“I pushed them away, John, I should try to apologise but at the same time I was only trying to protect Willow and I, so should I apologise for that?”

“You shouldn’t apologise for wanting to protect yourself and our child especially when we know the circumstances in which you were in but you should not push them away now for fear of what might happen. These people are our friends Sherlock, they only want to see us happy and know that you’re alright ok? They will understand the distance that you put between them and you once you will have explained.”

“You’re sure?”

“Absolutely! Now if you want me to come along let me know, we can bring Willow downstairs to Mrs H, she'd be delighted, I don’t think we should take her to meet them just yet… We need to let them digest these new proceedings first I think...”

“I agree.”

They arrive at St Bart’s and as agreed they are going together but Sherlock will go in alone to speak to Molly, at least for a bit.

“Molly?” Sherlock asks pushing the door to the lab.

“Sherlock? Dear god, you’re back! I was so worried!” she says hugging him.

Sherlock is a bit surprised at first and does not know quite how to react at first but then imagine that the best thing to do should be to return the hug so that’s what he does.

“I thought… I thought you went back to chasing Moriarty’s network, I was so worried that something might happen to you.”

“I’m sorry Molly my intention was not to worry you but I just had to go away for a while, clearing my head a bit...”

“Is it because of John’s wedding?” Molly could sense that Sherlock was going to deny it and was preparing a lie “Don’t lie to me. You know you don’t have to pretend with me. I saw the look on your face just before you left the reception and you were sad for the few weeks after and then you suddenly disappear.”

“I… Yes it was partly because of John’s wedding, I was kind of hurt I suppose and I couldn’t continue as before without him or with how the things were but that’s not all...”

“What is it then? What happened? Did you get hurt?”

“Nothing bad though I did get a new scar here.” he says showing his belly.

“Appendicitis?” asks Molly not quite understanding.

“Not quite. Molly a lot of things have changed since I’ve been away and you might want to sit down to hear what I’m about to tell you. Do not worry though I’m alright, I’m quite well actually.” he says smiling.

And Molly relaxes a bit sitting on a stool of the lab, Sherlock sits in the stool opposite taking a big breath.

“I don’t really know where to start actually...”

“Where have you been?” Molly helps.

“Sussex. I went back to live with my parents for a bit. I needed a change of air.”

“And what have you done there for these last few months then?”

“Tried to relax, solved a few cases by email or over the phone with Lestrade, but mainly trying to take care of myself.”

“That’s good then! You’re feeling better now?”

“Yes, a lot better... I don’t know how much you know about John and Mary?”

“Haven’t really seen them since the wedding, though I think I saw John a few months ago, he was asking about you. Does he know you’re back in London?”

“Yes, he knows. He came with me actually, just went upstairs to see Mike.”

“Oh, I see! So you’re fine then?”

“More than fine. We’re together actually...”

“Together? You mean as a...”

“Couple yes! Mary and John divorced a few months ago. John got in contact with me again and went to visit me at my parents’ place a few weeks ago and then it’s just sort of happened...”

“Oh, Sherlock I’m so happy for you! You’ve been pining for him for so long I could tell.”

“I wasn’t pining for him!” says Sherlock a bit affronted.

“Yeah whatever you wish to call it but you were definitely in love with him.”

“I still am. He’s the best thing that ever happened to me, no offence.”

“None taken. I know that you could never have loved me like I used to love you, especially after John came along. I’m glad that we’re friends though.”

“You’re a good friend Molly and I do love you just not that way.”

“I know. No worries I got over it now Sherlock. I met someone actually, nothing serious yet but I like him.”

“I’m glad, you deserve it, you deserve to be happy.”

“I am but don’t try to change the subject! I can see that you’re hiding something else, am I right?”

“You are. The thing is that before John and I were together we did have a thing...”

“A thing?”

“I mean sex. That’s all it was at the time at least for him and it only happened once.”

“Ok, was it before you went away playing dead?”

Sherlock made a face.

“Sorry I shouldn’t have worded that way.”

“No that’s fine and no it was after that. It was after I came back. It was 10 months ago actually.”

“10 months ago? That would have been just before...”

“Before John’s wedding yes 2 days before to be exact the night of his stag night. We were a bit intoxicated and I wanted to have him just for myself at least once, it was my last chance...”

Sherlock feels the tears pricking at his eyes thinking back at his emotions on this night. It was at once the best and worst night of his life. The best because he was finally testing every inch of John’s skin and the worst because every touch felt like a goodbye, almost a farewell.

“I understand.” Molly’s voice brings him back to the present.

“Anyway we just continued as if nothing happened, after all, John was getting married it wasn’t the time for a big reveal. But a few weeks after I learnt that I had a sort of condition… nothing bad, nothing deadly, just something that gives me some special capacities. It’s called masgravida and as I’m sure that you have some basis of Latin due to your medical background, you can guess what sort of capacities that give me.”

“Masgravida...” says Molly trying to translate in her head “Oh my god! Are you telling me that you got pregnant after you spend the night with John?”

“I did. That’s why I went away, I was panicking and I didn’t want anyone to know in case you let John know, I was terrified, I didn’t know how he would react. So I try to continue as usual for as long as I can until my belly started to show. I told Mrs Hudson and my brother and with his help, I disappeared to the countryside.”

“What happened then?”

“John was worried and started to try to contact me while I was trying to get away from him unless he learnt about the baby. I stay with my parents for a while and then gave birth at a clinic nearby. My mother took the matter in her own hands and called John to let him know that he was a dad. John immediately came to see me at the clinic and we talked and get our shit sorted as you may say...”

“Wait are you telling me that not only you and John are an item now but you also have a child together?”

“Yes that’s what I’m telling you, I thought it was rather clear.”

“Sorry to interrupt I was just wondering how you were doing?” says John “I'm interrupting something aren’t I?” seeing the look of shock on Molly’s face.

“No you’re not John, I was just finishing catching up with Molly with what happened these last few months. She now knows about Willow. One done, one to go.”

“Willow? That’s a girl then?”

“Oh yes sorry, I forgot to mention that. Her full name is Willow Joanna Watson Holmes.»

“Is that the only thing you forgot to mention Sherlock?” asks John suspicious.

“I think so, I even told her about your stag night.”

“What? Why?”

“Well I have to explain when and how Willow was conceived no? Don’t worry, I didn’t give too many details.”

“I should hope so! I’m sorry that might come as a shock to you,-” he says turning to Molly “-it surely was at first for us but we are good now, more than good actually! Right love?” He says putting one arm around Sherlock

“Absolutely John!”

“Of course you’re welcome anytime at Baker Street to meet our little darling.”

“Thank you, I would be glad to meet her for sure. I’m so happy for you. You really deserve it after all you’ve been through.”

“Thank you Molly.” replies John.

“Maybe you can come with your new boyfriend and we can make sure that he is worthy of you.” Sherlock says with a smile.

“New boyfriend? I see we're not the only ones hiding secrets.” says John chuckling.


	16. Epilogue Chapters moved to the 2nd part of the Series

Dear Readers,

I wanted to inform you that I have moved the epilogue chapters of this story to [ a new part of the series.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20521178/chapters/48704540)

2 new chapters are waiting for you over there, so for those of you who have been following this series you can go directly to [chapter 3](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20521178/chapters/48704732#workskin) to discover them :) 

Hope you'll like them!

 

**Author's Note:**

> Come and say Hi on [ my Tumblr ](http://artsherlocked.tumblr.com/)  
> If you have requests or prompts you can contact me either through my Tumblr or by sending me an email at artsherlocked@gmail.com. I also started to do some fanart so you can ask for these too. 
> 
> Hope you liked the story! Leave a kudo or comment to let me know :)


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